#and forever using his care for bad as a distraction to not focus on his Own woes

[pyrosomatic-metamorphosis]

thinking about 4halo again and dying

they just. they used to be so sweet together. and then the election arc managed to genuinely turn them against each other (and bad is still affected by being caged in the museum) and i would NOT have been surprised if a rebellion had started within the next few weeks after their last fight and. they used to be friends and then they almost destroyed each other

and then the eggs went missing

and there are so many parallels between them, but one of the biggest parallels is how they're both protectors. they both protected the eggs (and, when he became president, forever extended that protection to the other islanders) but the eggs went missing and they had to put all of that aside. Forever was quicker to put it down than Bad was (it felt like only a very temporary truce, from Bad's end), but they put their problems on hold, because their eggs. were gone.

and another parallel. the destruction. both of them with their plans to cause ruin because then, maybe, theyll get their kids back. bad caused most of the grieving arc damage directly, and got aypierre and antoine to help him. he dug holes in the ground. he placed mines everywhere and leapt into them. he started the lavacasting process of the fed building (and was interrupted by admins, so he stopped, but philza and fit were still right to laugh at him lmaoo). he drilled a hole through the side of the federation office from a huge distance away. he has chosen to hurt his friends and himself to get the eggs back. whatever the cost.

forever destroyed the island. or he planned to destroy the island. or he was interrupted just before he destroyed the island or or or. I don't know. but it was big, and it was bad. bad enough that the feds had to step in and forcefully drug him, and kickstart the happy pills arc.

and the happy pills arc..... oughghghgh as fucking awful as it was for their characters to experience i genuinely truly think that it saved them from each other. when he was first told about forever being fucked up bad was still in the "i need to kick his butt" mindset, and was all ready for an excuse to kill forever. and then he saw forever. and the first proposal happened. and bad was angry and he was sad and upset and he was careful. forever tried to kill him. bad decided to save him. forever kept trying to marry him. forever kept taking the pills. forever was so scared of his own anger and all of the damage he could and would have caused to his family that he kept taking drugs that kept him so out of his mind he hallucinated his son was just sleeping safely at his house.

and they both tried to kill each other. and they both failed.

and bad showed phil and cellbit (and tubbo) the item scanner that dapper discovered, which could destroy him, because nothing else was working. because they needed to save forever. because bad was reminded by then that forever was a victim of the federation instead of just a mouthpiece for it. and then when forever woke up he saw bad, suffering, and so excited to see him awake.

and now they're here on opposite sides again with forever projecting his protection urges onto the fed worker in bad's basement and bad frustrated that he isn't being believed and his evil plans of giving ron lemons apology brownies is being interrupted and. look at them. soft "i hate you" and the appreciation room and bad's quiet heartbreak when he learned about forever being missing and the "i miss you" book bad got mad at because it asked him not to torture fed workers. does anyone hear me im so ill about them. do you understand they care about each other so much and the happy pills arc reminded them of that. forever realized bad is colourblind and bad assumed forever was poisoning him and then forever helped bad cheat on another colourblindness test and forever was giving bad flowers and bad was accepting them and accepted that he was colourblind despite his previously constant denial and! i don't know if im being comprehensible and i dont really care i will be honest i just need you to know i am frothing at the mouth like a rabid little beast. they are a TRAGEDY of miscommunication and external pressure but they love so so much. platonic or romantic or qpp they CARE and it tears me to shreds

[catboyieejeno]

mingyu + foreplay

18+ minors do not interact!

• kim mingyu, who leaves so many kisses all over your body that you can't get the feeling of his lips off your mind for days after.

“god, i could kiss you forever.”

• open mouthed kisses along your neck and the expanse of your chest first thing in the morning, panting and groaning into your skin and muttering a string of pleas and praises with his little lisp, that’s even more obvious when he’s just woken up

“please let me feel you, need to feel you so bad right now,”

• or at night, dragging you onto his lap fresh out of your shower to wrap a hand around your jaw/throat and kiss your lips slowly and sensually. would drag his palms along your spine to pull you closer, all the way up until his fingers disappear into your hair, the smell of your body wash and shampoo driving him up the wall and making his dick swell up in his sweats

“y’smell so good. fuck, i just wanna taste you,”

• the feeling of his hot tongue dragging across your stomach and thighs is so dizzying that it immediately makes your vision lose focus. he's obsessed with being the reason for that look on your face, eyes hazy and glossed over, drooling lips wordlessly begging him for more.

“mmm, look at you. my pretty baby is fucked out already?”

• makes out with your pussy over the layer of your pretty cotton panties until you're soaked-through and whimpering. absolutely loves when your squirm or try to wiggle away. loves to subtly dance along the line of edging and overstimulation.

“don’t run baby, let me make you feel good. you can take it right?”

• doesn’t abuse his strength, but will use it to his advantage when it comes to sex. keeps your pretty legs pinned open, or your hips rolling against his nose and tongue while you’re sitting on his face, even when you’re so exhausted from coming that you can barely hold yourself up

“I got you, honey. stay just like this f’me.”

• if any if the members are there, he’d cover your mouth with his hand to muffle your whimpers and cries as he rubs your clit with his fingers relentlessly. mind you—a few things can be true at once: yes, he loves the noises you make and would do absolutely anything to hear them as loudly and clearly as possible. yes, he doesn’t actually care if the members hear, nor does he care about the teasing he’ll have to endure later (besides, he knows they can probably hear you either way, despite his best efforts to keep quiet). while those facts are both very true—god, does he love how shy and nervous you get at the thought of being overheard by them, eyes blown wide and brows furrowed as you struggle to keep still and quiet all at once.

“Gotta be good and stay quiet, baby. you can do that, right?”

• loves to tease you before actually putting it in: taps his head against your puffy clit, presses himself to your entrance only slightly, chuckles breathlessly when his tip is so fat that it slips and ends up just laying heavy and hot on your pelvis or poking your thigh instead. slides his dick between your lips until you’ve soaked every inch of him and you’re shaking with need from the stimulation to your clit and the desire to just be filled up.

“be patient, yeah? let me enjoy this pretty pussy.”

• so easily distracted by you… if you were helping him with dinner he’d turn off the stove at the sight of you in your little shorts or lack-thereof, if you’re wearing just his shirt. immediately bends you over the counter and eats you out from the back, face buried in your pussy and hands sliding your shirt up or pinning your wrists together on your back

“forget the food baby, it can wait when you’re wearing those little shorts…”

• pictures. of your tits covered in his spit, of the marks he left on your ribs or thighs, of your spent pussy covered in his cum, of your hands wrapped around his cock, of his hand print on your ass—keeps them in a hidden photo album and jerks off to them all the time when he’s away. sends you videos of him touching himself, audio on.

“m’thinking about you. and looking at our pictures. goddamn… wish i could fuck you right now. i miss you so bad.”

[girllblogging777]

𝐸𝐶𝐻𝑂𝐸𝑆 𝑂𝐹 𝐵𝐸𝑇𝑅𝐴𝑌𝐴𝐿

↳ mattheo riddle x fem!reader (angst)

↳ 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑑 𝑐𝑜𝑢𝑛𝑡 : 1,6k

𝑠𝑢𝑚𝑚𝑎𝑟𝑦 : you find out that mattheo and you are working for different sides in the war, and using each other to get information. was your relationship ever real ?

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

“and that’s why i love them,” you giggled breathlessly after explaining what seemed to be your entire life story to the boy next to you. propped up on his elbows and looking at you with a mischievous grin, mattheo riddle had listened carefully to every word that hung from your lips for the past half hour. “i understand why those flowers are so meaningful to you now,” he declared softly, glancing at the vase of lilies on your living room table.

the two of you were lying on the floor of your tiny flat in london, a place where you’d never let anyone in before. after graduating from hogwarts a couple of years ago, you had completely shut the rest of the world away to focus on your work as a spy for the order of the phoenix. obviously, no one knew that, not even the boy next to you, with whom you had been entangled for a couple of months.

“yeah, lilies are my favorite…” you muttered, running a finger over his chiseled jaw and the scars on it that you knew all too well. both former students at the wizarding school, it was quite ironic that the two of you had never interacted during your teenage years. you had always been the confident girl who never cared much about the male species, and he most definitely liked getting attention from women, to cope with his lack of them in his emotional life.

however, your relationship with the wicked boy had changed when he saved you a couple of months ago near the diagon alley. you had been on a mission to find something specific for the order of the phoenix at borgin & burkes in the infamous and dark knockturn alley, known for its dark magic and bad reputation. just as you were about to leave, some people cornered you in the shadows and, for the first time in your life, you had been powerless.

you should’ve known better than to leave your wand in your bag and your mind elsewhere. thankfully, a dark-haired boy that you recognized as the son of voldemort had appeared like a miracle and grabbed your hand to leed you away safely. “why are you doing this? aren’t you supposed to be on their side?” you’d asked, confused to why he would help you. he had simply glared at you and answered in a whisper, “i’m not the enemy.”

a lot of things had changed between you since then. despite not knowing what he had been doing in that alley, even after the countless times you’d asked him, you were forever grateful for his presence that day. you had offered to go out for a butterbeer as payback, and what was supposed to be a one-time thing turned into regular coffee or lunches together. slowly but surely, mattheo let his guard down with you and began enjoying your company. you couldn’t say you were surprised when all your time spent together turned into more, and polite conversations turned into intimate actions.

the young riddle and you had nothing official going on. at first, you’d told yourself he’d be a simple distraction from your dangerous life and complicated missions. he wouldn’t commit and neither did you, both of you always having to “run some errands” and “visit friends from hogwarts.” you would’ve questioned his weird behavior if you were actually dating him, but since the two of you were not attached, you couldn’t blame him. after all, you too had secrets. the simple fact that mattheo riddle had known you enough to let you into his messy life was a sign that he was worthy of your trust, or so you thought.

the energy in the air was different today, as if something was off. perhaps it was because you had done something you always forbade yourself—inviting someone over to your place. “is that a cloak?” mattheo chuckled, his gaze shifting from the vase of lilies to the coat hanger. you froze when you realized what he was referring to, the large navy blue fabric that you used when going on undercover tasks hanging in front of you like a deer in the headlights. “uh yeah, i wear it sometimes when it’s cold outside,” you lied through your teeth, internally cursing yourself. merlin, that was exactly why you shouldn’t have had him over. the brunette boy didn’t quite understand your reaction and simply switched topics, curious about the expression on your face.

✩✩✩✩

whatever calmness you had felt the other day when you were with mattheo was long forgotten by now, you thought as you walked back to your apartment a week later. the first odd thing you noticed was the broken portal of the building that not only happened to be your home, but also the order’s headquarters. then, your ears perked at the sound of glass breaking and people screaming. grabbing your wand from your coat pocket, you put the hood of your navy cloak on and entered the hidden building, not without muttering a quick prayer.

nothing could’ve prepared you for what you found inside. you barely registered the documents on the floor and broken windows before going into attack mode and throwing spells at everyone around. most of the people you recognized as your allies, but it was the others that startled you. with their masks and dark attires, your biggest fear had come true: the death eaters had found you. one of them threw something at you and you dodged it by hiding under a desk. your brain was on high alert and you tried your best to fight back against the shadowy figures surrounding you.

they were everywhere. throwing spells and punches, this situation was by far the biggest and most dangerous mess you had ever witnessed in these last few months. because unlike those times, you weren’t ready. “how did they find us?” you thought, sending the death eater’s wand flying through the window. “there must’ve been a spy, but who?” you kept wondering before you were sent reeling when the guy’s fist connected to your jaw. elbowing him in the stomach as hard as you could, you managed to knock him unconscious and throw yourself behind the table when a spell whizzed past you.

you winced when the all-too-familiar metallic taste of blood filled your mouth. you could also feel the thick liquid running down your waist, mixed with the water from the broken vase of flowers on the floor. “lilies,” you registered, “my favorite.” how utterly stupid to think about this during your last moments of life. trying to reach for your wand, you looked up to find another masked man towering over you. “that’s it,” the voice in your heart whispered, “that’s how it ends.” you looked up to the person who was about to take your life, and you swore you could’ve seen him flinch. hiding behind his costume, the boy’s wand trembled when your face appeared from under the hood. the navy cloak, the lilies, that day in the diagon alley— that’s when you understood.

mattheo riddle. the man facing you, holding out his wand in order to throw the death curse at you, was no other than the boy who you’d been kissing in the same living room a week ago. you couldn’t see his face, but you swore you could recognize those deep chocolate eyes anywhere. today, gone was the soft and loving look he always saved for you. his gaze was indescribable. in this moment, you couldn’t hear the people fighting and shouting around you. it was just the pain of your heart breaking, and him standing in front of you.

“it was you,” you whispered, “i thought you weren’t like them, you said you weren’t the enemy.” mattheo’s breath came out shakily at the familiar sentence. how stupid were you to think he was different that him, than his father.

“i’m not the enemy,” he said quietly, his voice trembling, “listen, i can explain-“ but this time you couldn’t believe him. the wand in his hand was still pointed directly at you, his fingers twitching as if he were wrestling with the decision to end your life or not. you could see the conflict raging in his eyes, but you also knew that he had made his choice long ago. perhaps even before he met you.

“then why are you here?” you asked, your voice breaking despite your best efforts to stay strong. “why did you betray us?” your voice broke in the last part “why did you betray me ?”

mattheo’s jaw tightened, and for a moment, you thought he wouldn’t answer. when he finally spoke, his voice was low and filled with regret. “i didn’t have a choice,” he admitted, his eyes never leaving yours. “they would have killed you if i didn’t lead them here. they still will if i don’t—”

he couldn’t finish the sentence, the words catching in his throat. you felt your heart shatter completely, the weight of his betrayal pressing down on you like a physical force. you had trusted him. you had let him into your life, into your heart, and he had used that trust to destroy everything.

“was it ever real ?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper. you stared at him, searching his eyes for any sign of the boy you thought you knew. but all you saw was desperation and fear—fear for you, yes, but also fear for himself. and that, more than anything, told you what you needed to know.

“i guess i was a fool then,” you said, your voice steady now, though your heart was in pieces. “for thinking you were better than this. than him.”

his hand trembled as you proved his worst nightmare true, and he lowered his wand slightly, the fight draining out of him. “i’m sorry,” he whispered, and you knew he meant it. but it wasn’t enough. it would never be enough.

as the fight kept on going, the echoes of spells and shouts fading behind you, all you could think about were the lilies—your favorite flowers, now trampled and wilted on the floor, a painful reminder of everything you had just lost.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

a/n : this was such a good request, please give me more !!! i also appreciate likes/comments and reblogs <3

tag list (tell me if you wanna be added !) : @redeemingvillains @helendeath @jolly4holly @fluffycookies22 @shiftingwithmars @shiftingwithleah @mattheosdior @tateshifts @yikesitslush @bellatrix-lestrange5 @fbvreadingblog @justscrollinthrough @enyway @dexoq @larmesdevanille @larmesdevanille @reys-letters @icantkeepmyplantsalive @myunperfektstorys @moonlightreader649 @sp7-mr @clar2aa

[heavenlyvision]

Pairing: Bi-Han x afab!reader

Warnings: 18+ only, cockwarming, no use of pronouns, no use of y/n

Wc: >1k

I’m about to sleep but my sleepy brain thought about Bi-Han so here you go <33

MDNI | SMUT UNDER CUT

You’ve been sitting on Bi-Han’s lap for what feels like forever, in reality it’s probably been something like half an hour but that’s still an obscene amount of time to be sat on his lap with his cock filling you completely to the brim without any relief.

You squirm and wriggle against him and every time you do he growls at you and slaps your thigh, admonishing you for not being able to follow simple rules. You had been needy and came to him, asking for him. He had told you he was busy and had things to attend to but he would allow you to sit on his cock if you behaved.

His actual words being, “Sit on my cock nicely and without moving and I’ll give you what you want.”

Now, you’re so wet, your slick leaks down the sides of his cock, pooling in his lap. He shows no outward signs of being affected but his cock twitches every now and again. Your cunt grips him tight, warm and gooey and it’s taking all of his will power to finish up what he’s doing. He really would prefer to fuck you stupid.

Which is why he’s annoyed when you grind down into him, “Hold fuckin still, it’s one rule.”

“Mm sorry,” you manage.

He only grumbles at you, not caring for apologies, only wanting you to behave and do as you’re told.

He’s especially annoyed because if you don’t listen to him then he’s going to have to punish you, which means not only do you not get fucked but it also means he doesn’t get to fuck you and he really wants to fuck you.

Your cunt pulses around him, thighs twitching with the effort of holding yourself up. Gods, you need him so bad, maybe if you focused, you could cum on his cock like this, without even doing anything. Only cumming to your thoughts and the feel of his cock stuffing you full.

Though he’s trying to focus, you can tell he’s distracted, he’s been reading the same thing for 10 minutes and you think maybe you could get away with lifting yourself up and fucking back down onto him. You know what will happen if you don’t listen though, it’s a high risk, high reward scenario.

You’re so fucked and wet and desperate that you throw caution to the wind. The drag of his cock as you pull upwards is heavenly and you feel bliss for a few moments. As soon as you begin lifting yourself up, Bi-Han grabs your hips, growling at you as he slams you back down onto him.

He doesn’t say anything, he just uses his grip on your hips to fuck you up and down his dick like a sex toy, the feeling taking you higher. His fat cock hitting every inch of you so perfectly, you could cry, already so close to the edge after being stuffed with him for half an hour. He continues fucking you down onto his length for a few moments before he slams you down, completely flush to him all at once. All movement ceased.

You go to whine at him but he cuts you off.

“Are you incapable of listening? Now I can’t even fuck you how I was planning to.” His cock jerks inside you, “That’s the most you’ll be getting tonight, now just sit there and look pretty.”

You fucked up and now your punishment is to sit on his big dick while he does nothing to you, he’s just going to let your cunt drool on him and give you no relief. Maybe if you had behaved, you wouldn’t be in this mess.

⋆⁺₊❅.

[lirarere]

headcanons relationship!

with pre cult! kai anderson x gn!reader

notes: ok I came back a little later than I wanted, but ok, at least I kept my promise lol, enjoy!

warning: nothing special at the beginning, except for jealousy and self-doubt kai, maybe kai is still a little ooc! at the end there will be a moment with possession, sexual themes (not explicit), spoilers, mention of death and corpses, anyway I will leave a note before this, so read carefully!!

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with the obvious: kai is an awkward virgin who has never even been kissed, he literally sits in his basement 24/7 and is the boss of reddit and 4chan and when he found you... god put a leash on him

it will literally be so difficult to tear him away from you at the beginning of the friendship, you are probably literally his only friend (not counting those very dubious dudes in the above-mentioned reddit and 4chan), of course he will be hooked on you and will be with you forever like gum on your jeans

most likely, you will confess first because he is too awkward and is afraid of rejection, he is also afraid that you will consider him an eccentric and completely reject him (he literally dreamed about this a couple of times and woke up in a cold sweat)

but when you admit... oh, be prepared that now he is not just chewing gum, but a stain that can never be removed with more than one washing powder, he has completely fallen

when you first hold his hand he has a little explosion in his head, his hand immediately becomes sweaty and sticky, you'll probably have to wash your hand (and him too) because he's a super wet boy

with kisses it will be twice as bad, if they are quick and on the cheek (most often on his initiative) then he will simply blush and wipe his sweaty palms on his jeans

if it’s on the lips, then he will lose consciousness, no, he will literally lose consciousness, his brain simply cannot withstand the overabundance of impulses and small atomic explosions in his heart and he will pass out

you are literally his first, just love him 😔

often when you hang out at his house (because he is a very antisocial person) you also often hear his parents arguing, at such moments Kai closes down and the tension in the air next to him can be felt for a kilometer. then you will try to distract him with careless kisses, talking about nothingthan watching some B-movie

most likely, he will tell some shameful secret about himself, such as: when his parents quarreled as a child (not so intensely, of course), he hid under the bed and then when he was already a more mature child/teenager. when you offer to do the same, but now he will be embarrassed and try to play "grown boy", but in the end he will crawl under the bed with you and you will casually kiss and talk about some nonsense (based on my conversation with the bot kai ♡)

speaking of parents, here are a few stories:

if you are a girl, then his father will consider you a stupid whore who only takes advantage of Kai and will leave him as soon as he has had enough (Kai is very upset, but he cannot do anything because he is afraid of his father)

if you're a guy, then kai's father definitely doesn't need to know about your relationship, he doesn't want his son to be some kind of "faggot", his father has already verbally attacked you a couple of times because he thought you weren't "manly" enough (kai still it's frustrating, but he understands that hiding is the best thingoption)

if you're genderqueer, then... well, his dad doesn't understand that, so he'll judge you based on your gender

however, his mother would accept you normally no matter who you are, even if you are a guy or genderqueer (she will get used to it)

with his brother and sister being more difficult, Winter and Vincent probably wouldn’t care? (or rather, they wouldn’t focus on it because they are busy with their own affairs) but they would be fine with the fact that their brother comes out of his shell and begins to contact at least someone

on especially difficult days, kai sometimes offers to run away to another city together, find a crappy, dirty apartment in a clearly unpleasant part of the city, find a dead-end job without career growth and live together... even if everything is bad, but at least there are no quarrels between his parents...

if you also have problems in your family, then you will become a support and consolation for each other and would always tell each other whatever you want, in the case of kai, his parents divorced, and in yours they either divorced, or if you have one toxic parent, then they would stop putting so much pressure on you... anyway you would they wanted Kai’s parents to stop putting pressure on him and yours to stop putting pressure on youif you have good parents, then Kai would definitely be jealous, but if they accepted him, he would have a reason to stay with you longer and basically hang out at your house 24/7

kai loves little moments of intimacy... he doesn't have much money, and the only thing he can give you is physical affection (which he saw in the cinema). you often lie together on the bed with your eyes closed, kai just holds your hand, pressing his nose against yours and rubbing itthumb on the back of your hand, he rarely whispers any comments and most often these are some sweet things like: “I love you”, “you make me feel freer”, “your hand is so soft”, etc.

he loves to hug you and bury his head in your chest, he loves when you run your hands on his head, sorting through the strands, he loves to lie on your lap with his nose buried in your stomach, he loves when you stroke him like a little kitten or when you gently rub him nails on his back, he lovesall the affection that you give him and will do the same for you if you ask... just let him be small for a while in your relationship, he needs it, he is tired of all this testosterone masculinity that his father is trying to stick into him

kai will try to make something with his own hands, a bracelet, a decoration for a bag (which you end up not wearing because you are afraid of losing), some kind of necklace and all that. he tries, threads, glue, or something unevenly cut, glued, etc. are always sticking out of the object, but you never throw it away...because kai did it

(spoiler: all his hands are covered in scratches, burns from hot glue, fingers are glued together somewhere and you always deal with this by covering his fingers and hands with bandages)

Kai is easily jealous, simply because he is unsure of himself and thinks that you can leave him for another person and because of this you have frequent quarrels, because he thinks that you are about to leave (he always apologizes almost on my knees asking for forgiveness because I’m afraid of losing you)

but when he sees you with another person, it takes a lot of time to explain to Kay that this person is just a friend and nothing more, if for some reason you fail to explain (you don’t find out what he saw) he will cry, think a lot and think a lot (take the poor guy to a psychologist)

he lies that you are so beautiful, successful, kind, of course everyone wants you, and he is just an insecure guy without a job who can’t even kiss you normally because he is shy, of course you will leave him sooner or later for a more successful person, just convince him that this is not so and youboth are losers (it’s better this way because if you tell him that he’s good, he won’t believe it because he knows it’s not true)

warning!! this is where more disturbing themes begin, if you don’t want to read about obsession, then skip it!

when his parents die... oh he will definitely become more dependent on you and will literally need you

he will do anything to keep you close to him, he will become more intrusive

when you leave, you must tell him where, why, with whom, how much, otherwise he will interrupt your phone with calls and texts and hysterics

his father doesn't accept you anyway, so he will just one day take you to his parents' corpses and say something like "now they will accept us because they won't have a choice", one day he will ask you to have sex in front of their corpses... have sex while the corpses are basically lying in the houseit's already tense... so you refuse and he'll sulk a little but acceptin principle, after the death of his parents, he felt a little better and he had some kind of confidence, so he is still putty in your hands, but it’s not a pity, simply because he is now obsessed with you (not as much as if he were a cult leader! kai, but still obsessed)

he doesn’t control you in everything, he just doesn’t want you to get hurt, that’s why he runs after you like a puppy

however, nothing will change much, except that he will begin to consider you a god/goddess, but this is still tolerable and worse will obviously await you in the future.

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notes: phew!! I’m unlikely to check this text for errors, so don’t let it be too obvious haha. I'm obsessed with pre cult kai so there will most likely be a lot of content coming out for that too!

masterlist

♡rere

[fairyofshampgyu]

i love himbo ! gyu so much tbh like it's brainrotting me ngl 💔

I ONLY JUST SAW THIS NOW FOR SOME REASON SORRY BUT OMFG YES HIMBO GYU 😩😩😩 I think about him all the time especially after your himbo gyu headcanons you really brainrotted me hard 😪 everything you said was so true bro ‼️No but that picture you used as your header always reminded me of frat boy himbo gyu as well like !!😩 so now i think we need to talk about himbo gyu more or I’ll explode.

Okay but also look at these pictures like he also looks like a frat boy himbo here hsfhfjdh

Anyway himbo ! gyu being so damn obvious with his crush on you whilst thinking he’s subtle but every time you’re in the room he’s staring at you like a hawk and not paying attention to a single thing his friends are saying, his friends asking him a question but he’s completely zoned out daydreaming of you lmao and yet he’s also so oblivious to your crush on him somehow when you’ve been straight out FLIRTING w him he just doesn’t seem to get it 😭

Gyu when you guys finally start dating being the clingiest bf ever he’s literally like a golden retriever or a lovesick puppy for you like he’s so down bad and once he’s finally forced you to cuddle him at the most unconventional times, he literally will not let you leave him for hours whining so loudly if you let go 🙄🙄

Complaining when you do work and never doing his own, luring you in by promising ‘study dates’ and that he will fr study this time but he won’t shut up talking about random shit and distracts you sm and asks for like 50 kisses 15 minutes into the session

ALSO HES SUCH A PERVVV and he’s such a thigh and ass man omg he will not leave them alone but bc he’s so dumb for them, you can use it to your advantage and tease him so bad 😌 like one time he’s just walking on campus and you run up to him and hug him and say hi then do a little twirl in a extremely short skirt or revealing outfit and bro has already malfunctioned and gotten hard 😪 begging you both to just skip class and go back to your dorm to which you dramatically gasp at like “you’re such a perv beomgyu omg.. !🫢😰🤨🤨 I’m just wearing a cute nice innocent outfit tf”

When that was literally your devious 😈 plan all along LMFAO TO TORTURE HIM AND GO CRAZY OVER YOU

He’s begging and pleading so bad but you force him to go to his class and he’s texting you in his class as soon as he’s in there saying he can’t focus bc all he can think of is you but he never focuses in class anyway 🙄

So you send him a few innocent pics in his lecture 🤭… maybe of your skirt ridden up a bit, plush thighs on full display and your panties

HE GOES INSANE, sending you keyboard smashes and saying he’s “fr DYING rnaBAJFKDJ<$*) STOP DONT DO THIS TO ME Y/N HSJFJ IM GOING TO DIE AND EXPLODE” he’s literally so painfully hard in his lecture lmfao but you tell him to pay attention

When his class finally ends he practically pounces on you dragging you to his dorm 😭 and now you’ll have to care of the mess you made of him, fucking your baby so dumb <3

Beomie’s got a big cock but dumb baby doesn’t know how to use it himself you have to help him :( so pretty but can’t use his pretty little head of his all the time

Call him a dumb puppy and he’ll literally whimper and cum in his pants right there he loves it sm, pull on your dumb puppy’s hair as well

Yes, he’s a bit ditzy but he’s def not dumb when it comes to eating you out though like you said, he could literally stay there forever and he’s so pussy drunk for u, pretty lips and tongue so good at fucking you and sucking your clit, big dumb pretty eyes looking up at you, he’s always begging you to sit on his face like he loves eating you out whilst you sit on his face and gripping on your plush thighs as he whimpers and whines underneath you it’s literally his favourite thing

Pretty but no brains or maybe he just puts the act on a lot more just bc he knows how much you like it and go crazy when he doesn’t know what to do and looks at you with his dumb puppy eyes, he’ll use it to his advantage as well to get what he wants, he’s still a major spoilt brat 😒

[twilight-at-midnight]

Caius having a mate with ADHD

Pairing: Caius Volturi x reader

Warnings: None

Requested: @fromheaventohell12

Request:

Can you continue with the sarong a reader with adhd? With Caius volturi?

***

• You like to play your own theme song when walking into the throne room where the kings are

• Your theme song is “Let The Bad Times Roll” by The Offspring

• Everyone being weary around you, as they don’t want to do something that could upset you, so they’re friendly yet careful

• As if Caius isn’t overly protective enough, he finds a reason to add on more to that. It could be any reason, which includes nothing, Caius almost never leaves your side

• Caius loves you nonetheless, he will love you forever and will love you to pieces

• You had good days and bad days, when it’s a bad day, you are distracted easily, can hardly focus at all on just about anything

• Sometimes when you feel the need of having to defend yourself, there’s a chance you can get a little too egressive, and the first time Caius saw that side of you, he was both surprised and amused

• Amused because you can strike fear into someone if driven over your limit of tolerance

• Surprised because a couple of confrontations you had with others turned into actual fights, almost like you were back in high school joining the other kids in a circle to watch a good fight

• The last fight you had started went a little too far, you had thrown a few good punches and hits that you had dislocated the poor man’s jaw and seeing you were at no point in stopping any time soon, Caius had to pull you off and stop the fight himself

• Though Caius would never admit it, but there have been a couple of times in which he was unable to remove you alone and sought help from the other kings who soon turned to be just as amused just as much as Caius had been, but they agree to intervene and stop the madness brewing

• ADHD is not easy but is manageable, Caius is always checking to make sure you’re taking the medicine prescribed by your doctor before he does anything else

• There had been one certain occasion that you missed because of how much you enjoy reading any book

• That event was Caius’s birthday and though he didn’t say anything about it, he found it adorable of you trying to go out of your way to make up for it

• In the end, Caius reassures you until you follow through and listen to him when he says not to worry about

• But in the back of your mind, you still worry and it wasn’t doing you any good

• Not only did you have ADHD, but you had anxiety along with it and that gave Caius the need to make sure you’re protected and not hurt

• If you’re going through one, he is always there for you, and he uses one or two of your own jokes told to him in the past by you

• “How did they punish Hellen Keller for using the phone?”

• You just shrug, already knowing the answer to this one and yet it still makes you laugh like it’s the first time you are hearing it

• Caius loves the sound of your laugh, that’s one of the many things he loves/admires about you

• Sometimes when you’re in the throne room with Caius, you have your bottle containing your medicine in your pocket. On several occasions you had left the bottle behind without even realizing it until one of the kings return it to you

• Caius doesn’t go anywhere without making sure you had what you needed

• He tries to keep you as close as possible, sometimes when he is with you during the night, you play all sorts of different games to help you to better focus

• The games you have come from the same ones you played throughout your childhood

• Your favorite was Yahtzee

• Sometimes you two wouldn’t be doing anything beside cuddling and taking it easy for the day

• Despite his busy schedule, Caius always makes sure to squeeze time in to spend with you

• Which is something you appreciate more than words can describe

***

@twilight-at-midnight

Characters:

• Carlisle Cullen

• Edward Cullen

• Jasper Cullen

• Emmett Cullen

• Riley Biers

• Alice Cullen

• Rosalie Cullen

• Benjamin

• Bella Swan

• Jacob Black

• Vladimir

• Aro

• Alec

• Caius

• Jane

• Victoria

[28gaugeshotgunshells]

TWO'S COMPANY, THREE'S A CROWD

.- TWD, Rick Grimes x F!Reader x Shane Walsh -. part two

__________ A/N: Oh my gosh! I was trying to edit the original and I mis-clicked and deleted it, so here's the re-uploaded version. Thank you all again for your support. This is the second part to TWO'S COMPANY, THREE'S A CROWD! It's recommended that you read that one first for the best experience. __________

It's quiet for a moment, Glenn merely staring at you in a haze of confused surprise. He opens his mouth to speak, and yet nothing comes out; the only audible noise around remains the swooshes of the country breeze. "You mean.. a pregnancy test?" He finally asks, gentle brows furrowed in confusion. "I-.." You pause, before taking in a breath and slowly nodding your head. "Yes. I'd really appreciate if you could.. be discreet about going out and getting that for me."

"YOU'RE PREGNANT!!?!" Glenn suddenly shouts super loud! Goddamn!! Bro could not keep a secret for shit what the fuck!!

"SHUT YOUR FACE GLENN! SHUTUP!!" You shout, covering his mouth with your hand.

"WHAUHOK!!" His voice comes out all muffled, and after giving him the bitch fit death glare for ten seconds you take your hand off.

"YOU! GO GET ME IT NOW!! AND YOU DONT TELL ANYONE!! or else you'll wake up outside of the shitty ass farm fence that doesn't do anything to protect us... and you'll be all alone.. and when you cry no one will hear you.. except the monsters will hear you.. and then they'll eat you up.. or whatever the hell Carol says.. I mean me.. I mean GO GET ME MY SHIT!!!!"

"Um ok." Glenn replies. Then there is silence... and then it smells really bad.

"Awe man.. silent fart." Glenn whispers as he turns around in disappointment and walks off. "OH WAIT! AM GONNA BRING MAGGIE!" He suddenly shouts.

"WHAT NO GLENN! DONT YOU FUCKING DARE! I SAID KEEP IT A SECRET!!!" You shout.

"AM GOING TO GO GET MAGGIE!" Then Glenn runs off!! that little shit!!

You shake your head in anger and then walk off, that fat hoe better bring you back your pregnancy test! You walk back to the residential camp part of the farm, side eyeing Hershel's house as you went. Why did those fat hoes make you sleep outside.. and why was Rick okay with being so hobo.

You miss TV and sitting on the couch.

You let out a large sigh as you walk, but then are interrupted by the sound of distant giggling. You look over and see Carl showing Shane a rock.

"Um, buddy that's gross don't be doin' that." Shane says, his voice heavily southern accented.

Carl says something but you can't hear it over the sound of your inner rage!! SHANE NEEDS TO STAY AWAY FROM YOUR BOY.

Suddenly you bolt over. "HEY! You need to stay away from him!!" You shout at Shane.

Shane frowns at you. "Listen I-"

"Hey mom look-" Carl tries to say.

"NO! I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT SHANE!" You shout back.

"hey mom."

"I wasn't trying to-" Shane attempts to interject.

"mom."

"I DON'T CARE! GET AWAY!" You hiss.

"MOM!!" Carl shouts at the top of his lungs as he shoves a rock in your face.

"WHA-" Your eyes finally focus on the rock.. it.. says poop on it.. and the poop is written with some weird brown substance.. Carl pulls it back and starts laughing his ass off, he laughs so hard that blood starts spurting out of his nose and onto you.

"AHAHAAH- AHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" He exclaims.

"OH DAMMIT! CARL!" Shane tries to help but you give him the 'gtfo!!' look and he leaves. And so, you deal with Carl's bloody nose all by yourself, and wait for the return of Glenn. But his ass is taking forever.. so you get mad. and take matters into your own hands. You storm up to Dale's RV.

"Oh hey (name)ie poo." Dale coos, wiggling his eyebrows at you.

"Hi dale!" You say very passive aggressively. "Guess what! There's this cloud outside that looks exactly like my toes!"

Dale practically jumps out of the RV and starts aggressively looking all over the sky. You take this moment of distraction to steal one of the guns off the counter and shove it in your pants. You then quickly get out of the RV like you didn't do anything. "

WHERE! WHERE?!" Dale shouts at you.

"I FORGOT!!" You yell back as you run away to the car area.

Dale doesn't even ask you why you're running because he's so obsessed with looking for that one cloud in the sky. You let out a loud phew noise as you head up to the cars. You tap your chin as you look them over. "Hmmm..."

They all look hobo so you let out an angry sigh and just pick the yellow one. You hop in and turn the keys that were in the ignition for whatever reason and then you drive off at full speed. As you drive into town for the pregnancy test you wonder what the hell is taking Glenn and Maggie so long.

--------------

meanwhile

"Hey Glenn."

"What's up, Maggie?"

"English or Spanish?"

--------------

NYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM. That is the sound of your car driving. "oh yeah I love driving." You say BEFORE HITTING SOME WAKLKER AND HAVING YOUR CAR GO FLYING WHAM!!! You scream and are so scared before everything goes dark..

--------------

Back at the farm, it's gotten really dark. Shane is a stubborn bitch so he's looking around for you because he wants to talk...

"Pookie?" Shane calls out, then he gasps. "POOKIE IS MISSING!"

--------------

Later on you wake up in the dark!

"Rrraaghh.. raggghh!!"

"SHUTUP CARL! I'M TRYNA SLEEP!" You shout instinctively as your eyes shoot open. Your head hurts like a motherfucker, and you can hardly see.

Your eyes take a minute to adjust to the dark.. but when they do.. you see some fat walkur trying to get at you through the windshield!!

"NAH! BROS CLAWING AT ME LIKE IM AN ALL YOU CAN EAT BUFFET!" You exclaim looking at the big daddy- you mean.. walker.. trying to eat you!! why was it kinda bad though... You think as uour face gets all hot and warm.. like really hot and warm like you had a fever or something... and then you kind of start sweating..

You quickly push those thoughts out of your head because you remember you are a married woman!! you can't have two affairs on your hands!! oopsie poopsie!

Quickly you do some really cool moves and grab your gun somehow and then you shoot the walker, the gunshot being so close hurts the shit outta your ears but like mama raised a fighter not a bitch or whatevr so you climb outta dat car and get running away!! back to the farm!! After a minute of running though you got kind of exhausted so you stopped to catch your breath.. and then you just started walking.

About like 30 minutes passed when you saw headlights nearing and you were like NAH!! who's that!!! and so you were about to jump behind a tree but then you heard a distant "LEMME TELL YOU SOMETHING!"

And you were like oh!! So when the car approached you hopped in!!

Shane spoke your name firmly, "What in the world are you doing out here?" He then asked.

But you didn't want to deal with his whiny clingy bullshit so you were like UMMM!! and then you pulled him in for a kiss!! OOPSIE POOPSIE!! then you pulled back and smacked him across the face.

"UGH IM MARRIED WHAT THE HELL!!"

"wHAT YOU KISSED ME!"

"DRIVE ME HOME NOW!!" Then you rode back in silence... When you got back to the farm it was pitch black, but everyone was outside of Hershel's house in a circle.. this was either the start of singing campfire songs and then participating in a crazy dance circle.. or you were getting an intervention.

You get out of the car before Shane and then run up to the circle because you just spotted Glenn. Shane follows shortly after you. You give Glenn the death stare before you look back at the others.

"GUYS WHAT IS GOING ON." You shout.

"No, wut is goin' on wit you!" Rick replies. "You were missin'! Where did you go?"

"I was OUT. okay." You reply, looking away from him.. you didn't want to tell him why you left...

"OUT doin' WUT!? Cheatin' on me again!?" Rick claps back.

EVERYONE GASPS!! and stares at you in shock.

"EXCUSE ME!? HOW DARE YOU! I NEVER DID THAT." You shout.

"I'm not stewpid..." Rick replies, shaking his head.

"mommy what test did you cheat on.. you're gonna have to retake it now.." Carl whispers.

"UM! SPEAKING OF TESTS! (NAME) IS PREGNANT!!" Glenn suddenly shouts.

"WHAT THE FUCK GLENN!"

"UM UM!! I CANT KEEP SECRETS!" Glenn cries out as he opens his bag and then quickly hurls the pregnancy test at your face before running away.

IT HITS YOUR FACE WITH A SMACK AND FALLS ON THE GROUND!! EVERYONE GASPS AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"YOU BITCH!!" You flip him off as he runs away.

"IM GONNA BE A DADDY!?" Shane and Rick shout in unison, both holding their head in their hands out of pure shock.

"AY! WUT!" Rick glares at Shane.

"NAW!" Shane glares back.

THEN THEY START DOING A PUNCHOUT AGAIN! SHANE KEEPS TRYING TO STRANGLE RICK WHILE RICK KEEPS TRYING TO SMACK HIS BUTT?! THEY FALL ON THE GROUND AND THEY ARE STILL GOING AT IT!!

"Dogfight!!!!!!!!!!!" Carol shouts.

THEN TO MAKE MATTERS WORSE DALE JUMPS ON TOP OF THEM, "Group hug.." He says as he creepily caresses them.

"WHAT!!!" They both scream as they suddenly stop fighting and hop up off the ground.

"what.. what happened.. huh.. where am I.." Dale whispers as he wanders back to his RV.

"uhhhh." Rick says.

Then you all stand there in silence.

"She's mah wife so it's mah baby." Rick breaks the ice.

"Um, I didn't pull out so it's MAH baby." Shane retorts. "

WHY YOU SUMOFA-!" Rick starts winding up another punch but then Andrea steps in!!

"guys stop this isn't you."

"ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm..." Rick ums.

You space out while all of this happens.. everything goes silent for you.. what were you gonna do.. and then your eyes flicker over to your left arm.. wait.. what was that.. You look.. and see.. a bite!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"OHHH!" You suddenly exclaim in realization, causing everyone's head to snap your way.

"What!?" Everyone replies.

"GUYS! I'm not pregnant! I'm just bit!"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

[another-heroine]

Friends to lovers for Katya & Lann ❤️: 10. getting physically close during the denial phase. IMAGINE KISSING AND FREAKING OUT SAYING, "friends... kiss. right?"

friends to lovers heart fluttering moments

Another episode of IT TOOK ME FOREVER BUT THERE WE GO

CW: Act 4 Quests, Angel Path

Lann acknowledged his limitations. Not in front of Daeran, of course, but deep down in his soul, where his weaknesses should be. For example, there were a lot of words he had no idea what they mean: mellifluous, eidetic, tintinnabulation, and so on. But at least he knew what boundaries were.

Something that Nenio apparently chose to ignore every single day.

They were back to the Nexus, after the last stroll in the Abyss has taken its toll from the team. He stood further from the fire, taking care of his bow and making more arrows. It was late and many already had said they good-nights and went off sleep.

Then he listened to a familiar giggle, one he hasn't heard since Galfrey sent them to that ominous place.

"She what!?" Seelah couldn’t believe that. Her whisper was a little bit higher than she expected.

"I know, right." Ekaterina nodded. "She simply asked me to take off my clothes because, by her research, some friends do that!"

"Oh Nenio." The paladin wiped her face. "What she gonna ask next?"

"I'd rather not to think about it." The Commander grimaced.

Lann frowned. What that nutty fox was doing? He overheard she abording some of the Nexus' people early, but had no idea what was going on. She was too unpredicable. Like when she asked him to take off his clothes because she wanted to make an anatomic drawing of a mongrel.

The monk scratched his chin, nervously. He would never understand.

"Then I explained her that not every friend do those things," the druid told, like she was talking about a toddler. "Kissing and sleeping together many times are related to partners."

"Do you think she really understood?" Seelah asked and laughed afterwards, when the Commander shook her head.

Lann frowned, trying to focus on the arrows. Uplanders were curious, too. Instead of giving rats or pelts to their significant other, they used to give flowers, chocolates and wine.

And about the kissing part... Nobody among the neathlanders were familiar to that. He recalled poorly his parents' relationship, his father was not fond to show physical affection, but his mother was, always hugging them, tucking their hair and kissing their foreheads.

"Hey, how are you doing?"

Ekaterina approached, bringing him to the present.

She sat next to him, sorting the materials he was using. Lann always made a mess while was creating anything. It was good to have someone tidy around.

"Almost done," he lied. The mongrel got distracted eavesdropping her conversation about Nenio and her experiments.

"I'm not talking about the arrows, you know?"

He stopped and glanced at her. She was serene, observing him with a subtly smile.

Oh, if a look could kill, that one could lift any curses he ever had.

She has found him at the Bad Luck Tavern after their encounter with Savamelekh. He would be lying if say he remembered exactly what they talked about, but the feeling that she also cared about him lingered.

"I'm getting better." He nodded. "I... still feel ashamed for making you worry, but hopefully I'll recover from that too."

The woman hummed, "Glad to hear it."

His throat was dry. Lann muttered, "Also, if you need anything, I’m all ears."

"Oh, not at all. I... just want to make you some company." Her eyes darted to the floor. "This place is oddly cold. And empty. Even I'm feeling uncomfortable with it."

Lann took a deep breath and put his bow aside.

"I told you that I will fight for you until the end, right?"

The aasimar looked at him, puzzled. "What do you mean?"

He had no idea either. But he wanted to say something epic, breathtaking, romantic. Like those cheap novel books in Mendev.

"Well," he cleaned the throat. "Keep you safe from the cold and the emptiness are also part of my goal."

First, she looked at him up and down. Then she arched a brow. "Do you wanna sleep with me?"

Uh, oh, Nenio, there was your biggest rival. Lann felt both warm and cold blood abandoning his face.

"No! I mean, err, yes? But not like, uh..." His hands waved in the air, like he was trying to weave the time-space and come back to the moment when his mouth was pretty shut.

Ekaterina covered her mouth, muting her laughter. "Calm down, I’m joking with you. Though I don’t have any objections."

Lann looked at her in panic. Was that an invite or a joke? She leaned her forehead on his, and the mongrel couldn’t take off his attentive eyes of her. They have never been that close until that very moment.

"Friends kiss... right?" The words tripped.

"You tell me."

Lann felt her lips pressing against his, and like a magical trickery, she found her way in.

[covenantofthedeep]

electric love ☆

feat. | mona, childe, zhongli, & jean summary | they have a crush on u! a/n | i am trying to write so bad. pleeaseee rb if you see this it really helps esp since i haven't written in a while <3 thank u

mona megistus |

mona's not sure how to explain the crimson flush that spreads from her cheeks to her fingertips when you're around, nor is she willing to.

she doesn't know what's happened; just a couple of weeks ago the two of you were hanging out every day, friends forever, but now it's like something's changed. she can't think of you without picturing your lips, or the sparkle in your eyes, and that throws her off so much she goes out of her way to avoid you.

sometimes from her window she can see you talking to someone in the square, the sun highlighting your face and it's like you've been bathed in an ethereal spotlight. when she thinks about talking to you, her mouth goes dry and she finds herself at a loss for words, and she's not sure how to carry a conversation with you anymore. she hates it, actually. she detests it. you? distracting her so much from her every day tasks that she drops a stack of books on her foot when she sees you sprinting after a cat? how dare you.

the last straw is when she takes a walk through the woods and ends up in a sunny clearing, and she starts to daydream-the sun is just so nice on her face like that, and she's needed a break--and her mind wanders to you. your hands, she can imagine them intertwined with hers. would they be callused, she wonders, with all the sword-wielding you do all day? and then she catches herself and her eyes fly open and she stands. this can't go on any longer. you're taking up too much space in her mind.

she never used to feel this way. what a curious thing.

tartaglia |

childe would rather saw off his own fingers than admit he cares for you, and that's quite a sacrifice, seeing as he needs his bow and arrow. he has tried denying it, going so far as to shoot you down when you ask him to go monster fighting with you, or telling you he's "busy" when you ask him if he wants to hang out.

the crease in your brow when he tells you no kills him every time, making him want to turn you around and shout, i like you!

but that's a childish move, and childe doesn't resort to such tactics. he's decided the best option is to squash down his feelings and act as though everything's okay, despite the fact that taunting you isn't the little game it used to be--the two of you firing insults at each other for ages. now he takes real digs at you, because maybe that'll convince his stupid heart that he doesn't like you. the wounded look in your eyes before the whip-quick insult you spit back makes him want to kiss you, and he's embarrassed to admit that your lips take up more time in his head than they should.

he has no words to say how much he likes you, and he doesn't want any words, either, because that would mean he would have to tell you. even if he didn't want to tell you, he's not confident that his lips would stay sealed around you--one quick smile throws him off his balance these days, and sometimes when you wink (you've always done that, how has he just now noticed how cute it is?) he thinks he sees stars.

jean gunnhildr |

jean's already busy enough without you bothering her. that's what she tells you when you hang in her doorway, complaining that you're bored and will she please hang out with you? she always felt like tearing out her hair when you bugged her, although lately it's been for a different reason.

sometimes when you come in and throw yourself across her desk, she can't focus anymore; she used to be able to tune you out, but now, for some reason, you've been a distraction, one that she can't afford. she's had so much paperwork lately, so many requests from the townspeople asking her to take care of this, look over that, does this sound good. she's just so tired of it all, and she finds herself looking forward to you coming in and throwing her off kilter.

there's something almost magical about the dust motes floating through beams of sunlight that cut across your face when you lie on the floor, an arm thrown over your eyes and paperwork strewn on the ground beside you. she can't put a finger on the emotion she feels, she just knows that on the days you don't pop in, it feels empty and lonely. on those days, she catches herself staring out the window, watching for you, waiting to see if you'll drop by with some sweet madames and an offer to go to the tree by the statue of seven.

thoughts of you won't leave her mind, and it irritates her to no end. her work's been sloppy for the past few weeks, and that's not her brand. she wants to yell at you for distracting her this way, but those arguments just end up with you taking her hand and kissing her on the cheek, which is a strange thing to be imagining about you.

and she asks herself every day, is it odd that she wants to kiss you?

zhongli |

zhongli prides himself on his emotional disconnection from this world, and the way he can stay stable in every situation. except, the other day, your arm brushed his when you were laughing, and his arm tingled. maybe he could've convinced himself that he's imagining things and you just shocked him, maybe, which sometimes happens between people when there's static, except it happened again, and this time when you were handing him a pile of scrolls and books you thought he'd like.

he had dropped them all, sending the scrolls unraveling and the books landing splayed on their spine, which he knew would bend them. you had flashed him a dirty look, but laughter danced in your eyes. and you'd helped him pick them up while he wondered what had just happened.

sometimes he thinks you've noticed that he's been stumbly and stuttery and a mess around you lately, but you choose not to comment and instead tease him about it, which irritates him, and makes him wish that he could fluster you the same way. unfortunately, you remain the same--irritatingly, frustratingly perfect.

he wishes he could invite you to dinner more often without it seeming strange, although you are his closest friend--it can't be that weird?

but he regrets it instantly when you show up dressed up, as though you were going somewhere else than his dining room. after apologizing profusely for not telling you that it was just with him, he feels bad the whole meal and decides to make it up to you by taking you outside to see the stars (although you don't seem to mind being overdressed).

the stars shine and mirror in your eyes, pools of night set into your face. he wonders how much he could possibly love you without his heart exploding.

[rise-my-angel]

New Year New Games

Pairing: Marcus Moreno x Female Reader

Length: 16.3k

Warnings: Nanny au, slight canon divergence, reader with powers, mutual pining, masturbtion, angst/hurt comfort, happy ending, smut, handjobs, p in v

Notes: Big thank you to @thewayofthemandalorian for letting me borrow the idea about Marcus's wife and caring for a younger Missy from Afraid To Jinx It 💜

You knew you weren’t getting out of this one. You had already skipped out on the Christmas party, and nearly everyone had commented on it. On the Monday you arrived at work and the first thing Marcus said to you was, “You didn’t come to the party? We- everyone was excited to see you.” Followed by a few vaugley annoyed emails from others in the office about you not showing up. Apparently your presence in the building was missed and you’re excuse of something coming up at the last minute was not accepted. 

Now though? You had been walked right into a trap just to coax you into saying yes. Ms Vox and Lavagirl had insisted in meeting up with you for lunch, claiming it had been so long since they’d seen you and wanted to catch up. You had Missy with you that afternoon, so you hoped she would be a good distraction for them. Failing to remember that she obviously was at the party, and wouldn’t be distracted by her charm this time around. 

“No one has seen you in forever. We miss you.” Vox was unfair. Toning her voice up to sound so sweet and enticing while bashing her well painted eyes at you. Lavagirl was a little more straight forward in intention, but stayed silent to let her friend play the guilt trip game. “There’s no way you aren’t at least a little bit tired of working in Moreno’s house day in and day out.” 

Except that was the opposite reason you didn’t go to the party. It was over half a year ago when Marcus’s wife had left. Signed her parental rights off and moved overseas to focus her life entirely on laboratory research. None of you were quite sure why she had to leave her family behind to do so, but judging by Marcus’s not so heartbroken response you suspected it was at least something that had been building up for a while. 

That’s where you came in. Your ability wasn’t special enough to put you in the prestigious league of Heroics, but kept you around them so long most of them considered you a friend. You could keep it dormant and that’s where you preferred to keep it. Ullr they called you, or when they tried to tease you about it, ‘God of Gambling’. You could use it to win any kind of direct amble, bet, or traditional game. You couldn’t bet on the horses, but you would always win a game of pool. 

Turns out, having such a specific skill set didn’t have much use in a combative world, and more often then not you were designated for office duty. Then Marcus’s wife left, and he found himself with a three year old Missy and no one to care for her when he was gone. So you volunteered. Coming here to only find out that the very team you were hired on to join, had no use for you made you feel left out. 

Tossed aside because what were you supposed to do? Fight aggressive, violent bad guys by challenging them to rock, paper scissors? “If I win six out of ten you have to promise to stop murdering.” Yeah that would solve the problem. So you forced it back, kept it dormant and tried to find purpose here, until Marcus needed help. 

It was a long talk when you approached him about leaving your job here and being a nanny to his daughter. You needed a purpose after the only one you were told you were destined for got ripped away for it’s uselessness. But half a year later you felt no regrets. 

Missy adored you as much as you adored her, and Marcus felt much more like a close friend than a boss now. Which was why you skipped the party. He to you, felt too much like a close friend and you had a bad habit of falling for close friends. 

You spent enough time as it was in his personal life, and the last thing you wanted was to come off as clingy or attached. You invaded their lives, their home enough as it was he didn’t need you in his home for an office party with people you didn’t even work with anymore. So you claimed something came up, but now the two women sat across from you at the tiny round table felt like they were closing in on the lie. 

“I’m not above dragging you out of your apartment by force to get you to go.” Your forehead fell into your hand as you sighed. Lavagirl wasn’t above making a scene and your nerves lit with anxiety at the prospect of being the subject of it. She leaned in across the table trying to catch your eyes. “You haven’t done anything fun for yourself since even before you left. It’s just one party and we’ll stop pestering you about them. Until the next one.” 

Your eyes dragged up to her, flat and amused as you tilted to rest your cheek on your palm. You did have fun actually, both with Missy and the more quiet hours you spent with Marcus when he comes home. Just spending time with him like you were regular friends. “What if midnight’s just too late for me?” 

Now Lavagirl was the one to give you the flat look. “Please how many times did I come back from a mission around eleven at least and there you were still working away? You’re telling me in what? 6 months you’ve changed and now abide by a bed time like a good girl? I can’t even get my own daughter to do that.” 

Your body dropped, eyes drifting off to the side of nothing as you sighed. If you showed up, did the rounds, made an impression as people were excited to see you maybe you could sneak out during a quiet lull when no one was looking. You were quiet for a moment, mind lost in thought as you sat unmoving. 

Vox’s quiet call of your name along with a cutesy “Please?” just sent prickles all over your skin. Raking across your arms and down into your chest. These were your friend’s once upon a time. It wasn’t their fault or choice that Ms. Granada kicked you out of the league. 

Before you could really think about it, a small hand tapped at your arm. You looked beside you to Missy’s wide brown eyes just as bright as her dads. “Daddy says I can come too. I can keep you company if you’re sad!” 

Christ almighty, her puppy dog eyes were just as manipulative as Marcus’s as well. His magnetic manipulation might not have been inherited, but apparently his adorable wide eyed convincing skills sure were. 

You ran a hand over her hair, noting in the back of your mind to braid it when you both got home so she didn’t have snow soaked hair dripping all over the floor. You didn’t even notice that you called the Moreno house home. Not her home, or even their home. Just home.

Warmth filled your heart as you looked at her, and flickered your eyes back over to the hopeful looks of your friends. Answering Missy was easier then answering them. So you pulled her head slightly towards you to press a kiss to the top of her head. 

Pulling back you put a hand over your heart, voice enunciated and exaggeratedly formal. “I’d be honoured Madam Moreno to have you escort me to the New Year’s Ball.” 

Her little face scrunched up in thought, whipping her head around like she was about to reveal a secret only to slide halfway off her seat to whisper to whisper, “What’s a New Year Ball?” 

Grinning, you cupped your hand around her ear, whispering just loud enough for Vox and Lavagirl to hear as well. “Like the fancy castle party in Cinderella.” Immediately her eyes lit up and clapped, voice loud and almost in a giddy ‘yay’. Catching eyes of other people in the cafe, but only attracting melted hearts of you and the other two at your table. 

She stuck her pinky out and waited for you to return it, as she gave a fond smile before looking to the others. “You can’t pick me up though. Give me time to get ready, alright? It’s been a while since I’ve been around everyone at once.” 

They gave you that at least. The rest of the afternoon was easy going. You spent much time in Missy’s room combing through her closet and drawer of little costumes trying to find a pretty dress that sparkled just like Cinderellas. Sitting on her bed, short legs waving back and forth as she tapped at her cheek trying to decide if she wanted a pretty tiara to go with it.  

By the time you heard Marcus’s car pull into the driveway you already had Missy in her seat at the kitchen table munching on baby carrots as you put the finishing touches on her dinner. As you heard the front door open, Marcus sweetly called Missy’s name. 

Her head whipped over to you, hair flying across her face from the swish, eyes wide and begging. Just a nod of your head and she jumped from her seat and ran into the other room. Judging by the clash of fabric, no doubt dashing straight into Marcus’ chest in a hug. You tried not to pay attention, or even look his way.

Hopefully he would make his usual plea that you shouldn’t feel obligated to make dinner, let alone set out a plate for himself and not you. Shake his head at your insistence that you enjoyed it and he’d leave it at that. You didn’t want him to bring up new years and immediately key out whatever lie you’d come up on the spot with. 

You only planned on visiting for a short while, avoid having to interact with him in a fun, champagne fueled get together where he’d let loose much more naturally. You could avoid your feelings when you still worked at the head quarters, distracted by non stop running around and being dragged by your ankles into office politics. Here you had Missy. You were hired to make her your priority so you could shove those feelings aside in favour of being a good caregiver and role model for her. 

But a party you had no obligations, and there would be no filter or work around to avoid him. Marcus wanted you to come to the Christmas party so much, he would be thrilled to see you at this one.

Lost in thought, you missed Marcus’s entrance to the kitchen. His presence only making itself known as you jumped at the press of his warm hand at your back and deep voice rumble in your ear. “I’ve told you, cariño. If you insist on making me dinner when you don’t have to, please make some for yourself too.” 

From the corner of your eye you could see his chin nod out to the only two plates set up one with a purposely fun Missy friendly assortment of food while the other clearly set up or Marcus with a little green bean salad on the side that neither you or your tiny ward would ever touch. “And I’ve told you, sir that I take on enough time with Missy as it is. She needs alone father daughter time.” 

Still not looking him in the eye, you grabbed the plates and swivelled out of his closeness by rushing out the long way to the table. Even a drink set out in a nice glass was there. Leaning down to Missy’s level you put her plate in front of her. “Remember, veggies first. So you can-” 

Her bright eyes shined up at you with a proud smile, “So I can end on the tasty parts?” You grinned at her and pulled her in to kiss the top of your head. You could only see enough of Marcus to know that pulled off his tie and undone enough buttons to let his chest breathe. 

But you still didn’t look at him as you left the room to put your jacket on. Marcus though was faster then you could leave, turning the corner as he called your name. Reluctantly you turned your head and instantly regretted it. His glasses were off so it gave a completely unobstructed view of his eyes that screamed warmth. “Are you going to be there tomorrow night?” 

You told yourself the hopeful look on him was your imagination. “I uh..” 

Marcus closed in on you, his gaze never straying from your shifting eyes. “Her abuela is taking her home if that’s what you’re worried about.” 

Christ how did a man with such a sharp power and commanding presence radiate a sweet energy that it could rot a tooth if indulged in too much. You switched your weight back and forth on your feet, knowing if you lied to him now you would secure him approaching you directly at the party about it. 

So you sighed nonchalantly and nodded. “I think so.” You looked up at him in the most fake casual manner. Maybe you really did deserve to be booted from the team, you couldn’t lie convincingly with a gun to your head. “Hard to say no when Vox gets on you about something, right?” 

His eyes squinted in thought towards you for the briefest of flashes before chuckling. The bass flying directly into your veins and flowed throughout with a guilty desire. A fond smile graced his features as he took a final step towards you, a hand gently finding a spot cupping your wrist that hovered by your chest still attached to your zipper. “I- good. We all just want to see you have fun for once. You work too hard.” 

If Marcus could feel the muscles in your arm tightening, he didn’t say anything. The needy part of your brain just begging for him to slide up just centimeters more and lock his think fingers with your small ones. But you simply finished zipping your jacket up hoping the movement would lose him. It didn’t, his touch followed the trail up to your shoulders only to burn your neck where he moved his touch to lightly cup the side of your neck and just under your jaw. “I’m serious. I want you to go, see everyone again and have fun. You deserve it, alright?” 

The rough pad of his fingers had your pulse explode into overdrive, again if he noted, not a word was said. You needed to get out of there. The longer you felt Marcus in your space, the more his comforting cologne scent filled your nostrils the more you couldn’t breathe. He didn’t wear know how weak being so close made you feel and you couldn’t deal with that right now. 

So you just forced a tight closed mouth smile and nodded. “I don’t know about that, but I promise to stop by.” You turned to open the door, yelling a goodbye to Missy only to be accosted by her tiny frame bumping into your legs. 

“Wait you need a pretty dress too!” Without thinking you crouched down to her height with an eyebrow raised. “The Cinderella ball, if I’m a princess you are too.” Turning in place she looked up to the currently impressive height of her father. “Daddy she needs a matching dress!” 

You laughed genuinely this time. “I promise I have a princess dress that will match yours perfectly.” To be honest you’re not sure you did but a promise was a promise to the mini Moreno and you’d have to spend the afternoon searching for one. 

You stood up to leave again, seeing Marcus with such a warm gaze towards you and what looked like a smile you told yourself wasn’t for you. You looked down at Missy as she gave one last request. “Glass slippers too! For the prince remember?” 

It didn’t occur to you that as she said it, her grabbing onto her dad in a cuddling hug was anything more then just an innocent hug. Marcus knew what she did, but you didn’t. “Glass slippers. Check.” 

Stepping out onto the porch you turned back as Marcus said your name once more. “Goodnight, cariño.” 

You felt your face flush, but bent your head somewhat out of sight. “Goodnight, sir.” Before finally taking off. He was itching to say something about the formality, you just knew it but didn’t bother giving him the chance too. 

On the way home, you ended up stopping by a little dress shop just to see. Missy ended on a poofy sparkling blue dress, much darker like a midnight blue but it was the closest you both could get to the dress from the movie. You already had an idea on what to wear, there was a simple deep orange dress that was a tad bit boring that would have sufficed. 

But here you were, looking for a deep blue dress just to you could make the little girl you watch happy for one evening. You couldn’t say no to her hopeful face, the bright shining one she got from her father and the one you avoided on him as much as possible. 

Settling on one similar in colour, you draped it over your bedroom door with a pair of nicer shoes tucked against the wall nearby. If you turned your light back on, you’d be able to see the dress. Watch as it mocks you for even thinking impressing either Morenos mattered. The love and affection you had towards them was real and tangible, and it just made you feel wrong for ever contemplating dropping any kind of hints. He was your boss no matter which job title you held and having the person he hired to care for his daughter fawn over him wasn’t appropriate.  

That thought though, didn’t cease to creep back into your mind as your fingers trailed down to your clit the longer sleep evaded you. You didn’t start with Marcus in your mind but he floated back in, buzzing your senses and losing your breathe to it. His tall warmth that could engulf you, burying you deep with the deep cadence he spoke to softly in.

Images of a face so handsome that if he worked at a normal office, he’d surely have women fawn all over him everyday. But you saw his domestic side, how his soft features glowed under the lack of eyes and pressure atop his shoulders. 

The more your core tightened in need, the more breathy the quiet noises you made felt. If you made as little noise as possible, even in your silent home, you might be able to pretend you weren’t teetering towards an orgasm at the phantom of the innocent touches he graced you with. 

Not knowing that Marcus felt a similar tightening of his own, only he let those thoughts dominate his mind and felt no shame for what his senses blew over him. 

Missy tucked into bed, he finally found time to wash off the day in the shower. Starting off with no agenda, but as the water grew colder, his thoughts grew stronger. Your wide eyed face whenever he was close to you haunted him. He wanted that look underneath him, on it’s knees before him, and Marcus desperately wanted to see how much he could morph it with wherever you’d let his cock inside of you. 

He begun gripping the base of his cock without much conscious effort, squeezing just tight enough to set the nerves inside him alight. One hand was braced above his head flat against the tile wall, the other keeping such a tight grip he could only stroke up and down slowly. You had never touched him in anyway that could be interpreted sexually but the memory of your hands on his skin burned an invisible imprint on the spots. 

Marcus had cupped part of your face in his hand tonight, he was so close to being able to pull you into him and find out what your lips feel like. Lips that he needed to feel all over his body. A shiver rippled down his spine at the thought and travelled into his cock with a slight twitch. 

His strokes slid faster and faster, never ceasing the tight roughness he held. The throb throughout it yearned to find out just how snug your pussy compared to his own grip. What you’d sound like the first time he eased himself into your pretty body. Marcus thought it would be soft, a quiet, reserved gasp that he wanted to fuck out of your worries. 

His thumb rubbed over his tip as he groaned, the ghost of a fantasy kneeling in front of him. Each rub imagined itself as sweet little kitten licks you’d tease him with. Your alluring eyes shut or refusing to look up at him in shyness there even in his fantasy. 

In tandem with the ghost in front of him, his hand slid down suddenly from braced above him to the shower lever. Just as the image of the same hand gripping your hair and guiding your head to sink down over his cock flashed just as he purposely turned the level to heat up. 

The slight burn from the shock of just too high temperatures so suddenly, the steam fogging up the entire room blended with his groans. Your beautiful self that walked and worked through his home like it was your own, the need you had to take care of even him had his jaw clench at the angry need to make you feel it in return. 

Through gritted teeth his strokes slid faster up and down his cock as your name moaned out from his lips. He felt no shame for how much he wanted his touch to be you, no shame for how much he saved your kind, innocent actions in his mind to jerk off too when he was alone. 

You were a beautiful creature in mind and in body, and Marcus was desperate to prove it. As his orgasm waved through him, the spurts of cum painting the tiles should have been your tits, your stomach even your ass. His cum was on his shower wall when it should be painted all over you. 

Yours was less satisfying. Nothing more then a shiver and dull fire that faded just as unimpressive as it’s size. You withheld his name on your tongue, and as you turned to the side you refused to pull a pillow into you to cuddle. You didn’t want to flame an unfair fantasy. It wasn’t Marcus you were cuddling into you, and you’d end up imagining no matter what if you tried. 

So you fell asleep, frustrated at the your petulant attitude of having to go to a party with people who want you there. Show up, praise Missy for her beautiful princess appearance, chit chat and then sneak out when no one was looking. 

Simple plan, but just like your original plan of being hired into the heroics team, fate would refuse to let it play out as you tried so hard to. 

It had surprised you that your biometrics still worked. You showed up to the outside of the complex with a long coat wrapped tightly around you to protect from the cold, but even in the tram to the main building you refused to let it up even a little. 

You felt exposed in this dress now that you weren’t alone in a tiny dressing room. The deep blue with a shining sparkle felt louder then the amount it even showed of your skin. Your arms draped and covered by it’s long material and the calves sticking out from where the dress landed at your knees were covered in a tight black leggings. You wore no more or less clothing then you’d ever worn in that building but it still felt suffocatingly bright. 

A few faces you didn’t know directed you to the main level where the event was taking place, undoing the front of your jacket as you did so. Trying to swallow the pounding of your heart at how shining it was already. Unfortunately for you, any chance at entering quietly was dashed as soon as you stepped into the elevator. Running in just before the doors begun to close, was a familiar flock of blonde hair and a tinge of an accent that never knew what an indoor voice was. 

“What the hell is wrong with you?” 

Your head fell back with a jolt as you turned partially to look at the man. Miracle Guy held an excited grin and arms wide open for a hug that he pulled you into as he continued his rant. “Half a year we don’t see you and you show up on new years looking like a five coarse meal, darlin’?”

 

Mouth slightly agape, you shook the surprise off your face. “It’s uh, nothing special- your suit looks good, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you in just black and white.” You shifted the attention elsewhere, Miracle Guy looked rather handsome, black pants and a white blazer trimmed with a matching black with what appeared to be a casual white long sleeve underneath. And there was no chance he didn’t want to boast about it. 

He pulled back and spread his arms out like a showcase, “My body helped pick it out. I’m telling you he got an eye for flash already.” He put a hand on his heart with a mock act of choked up, “I’m so proud.” 

You half smirked as you rolled your eyes, once again pulling your coat to hide your dress once more as you turned back to the doors. “Good to know that some things never chance.” 

Miracle Guy chuckled beside you, “Don’t worry, darlin’ I guarantee no one around here’s changed since you left. You’re in good hands.” Just as the doors opened, he shoved you a bit to go in front of him completely oblivious that being the subject of his dramatics was the last thing you wanted. 

A skilled hero and good man, but one of the most casually dumb person you know. Passing a newly installed rack of hooks, clearly for the line of jackets currently decorating the entrance hallway Miracle Guy pulled off your jacket with no warning. 

Making you fall back slightly with a yelp, now you were out there. Your conservative skin covering outfit ready to trick you into feeling all eyes on it. Miracle Guy’s hands patted down on your shoulders and walked you forward, the volume of the party just out of view around the corner. “Time to swallow those nerves, gotta show off our sparkling guest of honour in her strangely sparkling dress.” 

You weren’t really sure what he said to announce you. All you could feel were eyes, too many eyes snapping over to you in too many emotions. They all were a blur as your heart pounded in your ears, being approached by a multitude of people. Most of which were your short lived teammates. 

Vox was unfairly stunning as usual yet in gentle muted tones, contrasting with the black dress on Lavagirl that did nothing to take away the brightness of her hair. You were pretty certain it was physically impossible to actually dye her hair. 

You didn’t really like the fawning. It was sweet of them to compliment you, but there was just so many people suddenly around you. Marcus was just out of sight near the other end of the room with a very similar blue blob in his arms, no doubt helping Missy show how excited she was about her dress. Next to him was Ms Granada, probably the one person you wanted to talk too less then Marcus. 

Luckily you were being dragged off closer to the bar area to be persuaded with an open tab. Eventually were you talked into have at least one since it was early on enough that driving later wouldn’t be an issue. For a while, things fell back into a calmer place.

You may just have been able to get out on time. Suddenly your name was being called as the midnight blue blob ran over to you, her dress shining in the light and her hair in a pretty little up do. You tried to push down the thought that Marcus spent time and patience doing her hair up so nicely and certainly not picture it. 

Hopping off the stool, you crouched down to her and welcomed her hug. Fixing her tiara as her impact made it fall off to the side you didn’t see the approaching figure. “And you were afraid you two weren’t going to look the same.” 

Startled by his voice, you stayed frozen crouched on the ground as Marcus picked up Missy, turning her in his hold so she could look at him properly. “Can’t be outshining you now can I?” He leaned in closer to her as she shook her head no, whispering something in Spanish too quiet for you to try and pickup. 

All you could see was Missy suddenly wide eyed and determined looking as she nodded yes this time before looking at you. “I have to go! Secret mission!” 

Laughing you said “okay,” before standing up close to Marcus to give Missy a kiss on the forehead before he put her down. Both turning your torsos to the side to watch her run off across the room to where her grandmother stood chatting with what was likely an old colleague. You chuckled to yourself, the admiration you had for her soared higher every day it felt. 

Braving a chance, you looked back up at Marcus, instantly regretting it. His hair was done, not pristine or slicked back but loose and wavy, the curls on him so soft and appetizing. Just a neat dark blue button up with far too many buttons undone at the chest and sleeves rolled up his forearms and black jeans to finish it off. Your heart fluttered at how handsome he was. 

“Turns out I wasn’t the only one she wanted to match with.” You tilted your head just the slightest in confusion before his eyes took a peek down to your dress and back up, never leaving your figure. In his eyes there was a flash of something you couldn’t quite catch, he was good at reigning himself in. “You look beautiful by the way.” 

Your face fell into a flustered embarrassment as you crossed your arms protectively over your stomach, pointedly not looking at him. “Everyone here looks good.” There was your complete lack of charisma or subtlety again.

Your nerves flickered on and off, unable to decide if you wanted more or less of this unwavering gaze he had on you. But his voice lured you in to look up at him regardless. “I’m serious cariño. You look stunning tonight.” His hand risked rising up to trace his fingertips over the fabric at your waste and ending just at your hips, keeping them pressed there. “But you look stunning all the time, so I guess that’s not really a compliment.” 

Mouth stammering with no sound of words even coming out you pulled your arms in tighter as the embarrassed smile stayed plastered. “That’s rich coming from you.” His eyes narrowed playfully at you as his fingers pressed into your dress more firm, likely now feeling the dip into your skin instead of the fabric. “Women drool over you online all the time, not to me.”

His whole hand slid into place your hip now in a caressing hold in his large, warm hand. He ignored your attempt to lessen the not uncomfortable tension between the two of you, his other hand raising up to tangle a bit of your loose hair in his fingers.”One of these day’s I’m going to force you to finally understand that.” 

Even though he wasn’t near your face you still shivered at how close his knuckles were to brushing your cheek. “Yeah right, you do enough as it is.” 

Hand curling more around your hip you felt a slight pull to move you closer, his hand in your hair still raking through the locks as you wanted but not dared to do to him. He may have already had a drink, he could just be buzzed and sweet you told yourself. 

Marcus seemed to reign himself in as well. Sliding his palm down your shoulder to your arm and letting it fall to the wayside. “I’m glad your here.” 

As if completely oblivious to the tender air between you two, Miracle Guy appeared by your side an arm thrown carelessly around your shoulders enough to jostle you in place uncomfortably. Marcus still with one hand on your hip moving up to your waist to keep you steady as he glared at your new companion. “Careful with her.” 

Ignoring the awkwardness, he pointed at Marcus “You don’t mind if we have our turn to have the guest of honour?” Marcu’s jaw clenched as well as the muscles in his forearms. Miracle Guy now tapping at your shoulder. “We require assistance, someone with your expertise.”

Pushing you now with his both hands on a shoulder each, he turned back once to his clearly agitated leader. “Moreno.” 

Marcus just ignored him. His brown eyes washed over you with that frustratingly addictive allure, “Go, have fun. I can have you later.” Your heart lurched along with a shiver down your spine as those alluring eyes dove deeper into something much greedier, only to be ripped away from you as you were not so gently guided to a green felted table. 

Your entire body sagged at the realization, turning to point and glare at him, Miracle Guy held his hands up in the air. “It was Tech-no’s idea.” Behind you the man yelled in protest. 

“Did everyone suddenly forget what I said before I left?” That was a yes, and when you looked at the table, none of them looked guilty. More excited actually. Cards were laid out in the middle of the table and it did nothing to entice you like the brown eyes somewhere behind you. 

Miracle Guy walked around you to lean up against the table, palms bracing him as he did so. “Come on, Ullr. Whats point of being the god of gambling if you never play.” 

Your teeth bit the inside of your cheek, already feeling yourself let your ability flow through the gates you liked to keep it locked behind. Still, you protested. “I’m sorry did everyone go deaf when I said I don’t like fooling around with this stuff?” 

It was laid out very clear, no betting, no stakes, no money. Some forms of gambling your power simply didn’t work with, but most you did have an advantage that would always secure a win. You didn’t even need to learn or try and finding fame and fortune that way felt like cheating. 

You hadn’t used your ability in any way since you left to be a nanny to Missy. Tech-no leaned onto his forearms resting on the table. “Hey, we only bet bragging rights not money.” 

Your arms crossed, looking to the side as you grappled with using this again. Vox snuck up beside you, wrapping an arm around your shoulders and one at your waist guiding you closer. “One game from the beauty in blue?”

You didn’t feel flustered in the way you did with Marcus. Less butterflies and heat in your cheeks, and more dread and frustration. “I thought you said you just needed my....help.” You weren’t going to say expertise that’s stupid. 

“Some of us learn by watching, teach us a few tricks, maybe a drink, have some fun, sweets.” Vox then slapped your ass gently as she walked closer to the wall beside the table. It’d been half a year since she did that, and now you remembered just how annoying but comical it was. Just coming from her though. 

You tapped your fingers against your arms for a minute. Breath moving faster as your limbs tingled uncomfortably, but you already had unlocked it. It wasn’t something you thought about or even needed to pay attention too. 

Play a bet, and you’d win no matter what. It was a spectacle they wanted, so just maybe you could give it to them and be satisfied enough to let you leave. 

It never sat right with Marcus. Your entire history with the organization. Marcus had been the one to hire you. A series of incidents occurring in New Zealand, rumours of betrayal and accusations of cheating spreading like wildfire amongst groups speculated to be involved in organized crime. It wasn’t necessary to his work at the time, but he liked to keep an eye on things like that. 

Eventually a name kept popping up, a pseudonym that claimed anything they showed up to a hosted gambling event amongst that community, they’d win again and again. Impressing the men so much that they rose through the competitions. Finally making it up to face off against one of the main leaders, and the host of the competition at his private residence.  

The next day, breaking news of a giant raid at the very same home. And only a whisper of someone they called Ullr to go off of. He couldn’t get his mind off of it until he went to look into it himself. A real shock when he tracked this figure down, only to find you in a tiny unimpressive apartment in the middle of a panic attack. 

Apparently being forced into acting as an informant for an organized crime system through a gambling competition was the local police station officers solution for failing to find a reason to arrest the woman who broke up with his petulant child of a son. 

Rest assured, once you realized who he was and the warm genuinity that radiated from him, it all came spilling out of your mouth. You didn’t even live in that country. A small vacation, a small string of dates with a pushy, entitled rich man that had you ending things politely, and suddenly you weren’t allowed to leave. 

Marcus was excited when he brought you back to America. Sure it was where your home was, but he also had been honest about your ability. Honest about wanting to see you find a use for it that didn’t leave you feeling used or dirty. 

But Ms Granada didn’t hire you. And she didn’t want you. So just as quickly as you had settled in as an official member of the team, she kicked you off and demoted you to administration work for the very team she kicked you from. 

He hasn’t seen you use your ability since. Not even as you liked to do, just playful jokes and laughs about it with the your former teammates. One could mistake you for never having it at all. Truth be told he was happy when you told him you wanted the job to be Missy’s nanny. 

Not seeing you everyday? He missed you, and he wanted to make it better but Ms Granada had his hands tied. 

Having you in his home, with his daughter and be in their lives sent his feelings spiralling out of control but still you never used it. And it left Marcus feeling unsettled as he watched you reluctantly sit at the table being dealt cards everyone knew you didn’t even need to look at.

But you always wanted to do things for people to make them happy. Maybe it was selfish to want that all for himself and Missy, but he wanted it all for himself because he wanted to make you happy in return. He wanted you to feel comfortable enough to give yourself to him, trusting that he only wants the best for you like you do him. 

He tried many times to make you dinner before you made his and Missys. But you were strict about your routine with her, and as much as it touched Marcus that you cared he just wanted to see you stop doing everything for everyone else. 

You weren’t happy at that table, but you were there letting yourself be a spectacle for an ability you were kicked out of your dreams for. 

Marcus begun making his way over to the table, circling around so he could see you properly. Drinks and laughs filled the entire area, but you remained mostly stoic. A calm, flat expression as you tried to force yourself into the same joyous feeling but failed. 

The group was having fun, but all you could see was your failure. People looking to you for entertainment that got to come back in the next day and live out the dream they were promised. It wasn’t Marcus’s fault, and you wondered just how much of it he felt guilty for. 

Guilt for rescuing you from an endless trap, only to be overruled before you even had a chance to prove your worth. You felt your own guilt as well. You loved Missy, and carving a part of your life into this small domestic fantasy with her and Marcus filled your heart with warmth. But you also had to watch his marriage fall apart for this little life to happen. 

Had to watch him come in day in and day out and act like normal. Act like it was just some minor troubles, when behind closed doors? He would express to you how frustrating it was, how difficult she was making it and how he was falling out of love for her quicker then it took to fall in love. She wouldn’t grant him a divorce because of Missy, only to walk out months later. Leaving behind nothing but divorce papers and documents giving up her parental rights. 

It was painful, and you didn’t know how fair it would be to Marcus to showcase your feelings for him when this intimacy only came about from his family being torn apart. 

You noticed he had begun to watch as well, but his face as hard and impassive as you tried to be. His brow furrowed in an unknown conflict. His eyes only on you. Not long after he came over, his mother joined passing a now more tired Missy into his arms. Whispering gently into her ear he pointed at the table and described what was happening. 

Her own head fell into where it could reach on Marcus, a hand gently resting curled up on her mouth as she watched you. You had played 4 games now, and still they playfully and harmlessly asked to keep going. So you looked over, a choked up smile on your face at the tired little beauty. 

She whispered to her dad back, and Marcus walked up to you, kneeling down enough so he and Missy were at your own level. His hand was cupping the back of her head, “Someone’s just a bit too tired to make it the entire night.”

You brushed a knuckle against her cheek. “Not waiting around for midnight? Even after all those light movie nights?” You and Marcus both knew that wasn’t true. Some days she struggled to fall asleep without her dad there, and she always wanted to stay up until he came home but fell asleep with her head in your lap anyways. 

She shook her head before wrapping her small arms around Marcus as much as she could reach, snuggling her face into him more. Muffled words came out, but you both were the only ones to hear her quiet plea. “Remember to leave a shoe.” 

Marcus chuckled as he pressed a kiss to her hair. His eyes looking over top his daughter to watch you mindlessly turn to the table and tossing a card play out that had the rest of the table groan in increasing defeat. 

It seems you played entertainer no more the second either of them came along. You turned in your seat, knees now dangerously close to bumping into Marcus. “And who is the prince supposed to be silly girl?” 

You could see her own brows furrow in a familiar fashion. Turning her head so the side of her face was smushed against his she tried to pull Marcus in closer. “Daddy.” 

Your heart fluttered, there was such a frustrated sincerity no doubt the former stemming from being so far away from her bed. Neither you or Marcus looked taken back by how quickly she answered. Missy was a smart cookie, it wasn’t so surprising that she picked up on the yearning leaking from both of you towards the other. 

Your only hang up was how affectionately Marcus smiled at her. He mumbled something to her in Spanish that you couldn’t quite pick up, but the words promise was definitely slipped in there. He adjusted her in his arms, so that as he leaned in close to your own face, it let Missy pause her hold on Marcus to wrap them around you. 

You felt your hands brush just slightly against the bare skin exposed on Marcus’s chest as you hugged her back. Pressing a kiss to her hair, you shivered as Marcus’s fingers brushed the hand at his chest. The slightest of firmer drags against your own fingers hitching the air in your lungs. 

The two of you found each others eyes with a darker emotion behind them that had your heart pumping harder then before. Finally he pulled Missy back into his chest, eyes on you as he leaned more to the ear furthest from the table. 

“I’m going up to my office for a while, okay?” It was something you’d heard many times before, but now there was a deeper husk, thick and heavy with what tasted like greed to the words. You only could nod, eyes no doubt wide and mouth slightly hanging open. 

Your chest heaving just once as you shakily exhaled what you didn’t even realize you were holding. The office that was on the next floor that you knew no one was on. You didn’t want to read into it, but more then once tonight there was a raking of his eyes over you that burned somewhere it really shouldn’t. 

Again, you barley paid attention to what you were doing as you watched him approach his mom, handing the now dozing off Missy to her as he kissed her forehead once more and said goodbye to both of them. 

No one was even paying attention to him, no one but you saw Marcus pause at the door. No one could see the clenched jaw as his fingers tapped against the frame, or the eyes that seemed to look down below your face and up before pushing off and disappearing. 

And no one but the empty hallway saw Marcus groan a strained string of swearing, as his hand reached to his jeans to adjust himself. He couldn’t stay in that room, watching you with with his daughter acting more like a mother then Missys real mom did. Watching you look at him with such bright and needy eyes that he’s not even sure if you realized you kept giving him. Or that gorgeous dress framing you so deliciously in a deep blue that matched his and his daughter’s outfits. 

He adjusted himself once more, the way you looked, the way you looked at him, and how much you matched tonight like a little family causing his jeans to tighten far more then he’d be able to hide in such a crowd. 

Now you were just jealous. Marcus was the one who managed to sneak away with no one noticing, but here you were. Still here, now leaning up against the bar denying any goads to join with more drinks from the increasingly rowdy team. 

You didn’t lie to yourself, it was nice to see them all so much looser then the usual professionalism and serious lives they normally lived when here. It felt much more like just a group of normal friends then who they really were. 

You had checked the clock a few times, and after it hit eleven you found yourself looking around to see if Marcus returned. Perhaps he went to his office to get away from people, did that include you? You practically lived at his house maybe he needed time away from you as well.

But then there was the fire that flashed in his eyes more then once tonight. A fire your imagination had only ever seen in the darkness of your bed in between quiet hitches of your breathe, but it never felt as intense as the real thing. 

Marcus might not have meant it that way, but deep in your subconscious there was a beg for it to be exactly that. Your conscious brain however, disguised it as a concern to check up on him. Just see if he’s okay and ignore the heat flooding your bloodstream, rising a sensitivity that extended to an uncomfortable awareness of how your dress rubbed against your skin like it wanted off. 

There was a melancholy yet liminal feeling as you walked up the stairs. Your heel rising enough from the shoe forced you to stumble a bit and slide your foot in more steadily. You smiled to yourself as you were knelt over, hand pressing the back of the shoe in more. 

Missy was ridiculous. Such a sweet and quiet girl, yet unashamed to be stubbornly vocal about things she really wants. She wanted you around more and more, and every time Marcus was home she always gave you such puppy eyes when you said goodbye. She was so attached to you and you were to her, so much so that on more than one occasion a stranger in public would call her your daughter or vice versa. 

Never once did Missy correct them, and it made you reluctant to correct the assertion either. If your phone wasn’t still tucked away in your coat pocket, you may have considered slipping the shoe off just long enough to take a picture. 

The girl was still a toddler, she still believed in fairytales and neither you or Marcus felt the need to break her of that illusion. 

As you wandered into the office floor, there was a beautiful blue light streaming in from the windows. The snow on the ground let the night sky reflect colour into it’s glow, and it lit up the office you once worked in. 

Tucked away in the corner by the far wall, as a tint of orange that took over the blue reflection. Not a vain man, Marcus’s office was small and cozy. Away from the larger, more lavish offices that the corporate heads preferred. 

The floor was silent as the carpet silenced the echo your shoes would otherwise have made. If you stretched your hearing, you could hear the faint scribbling of a pen, and coming up closer you had just enough of an angle to see his phone haphazardly tossed onto the small couch pushed up against the wall. Sitting on it’s side as it lay on the inside arm, it clearly landed there in carelessness rather then placed neatly. 

Marcus didn’t immediately notice your presence as you peeked inside. His well manicured curls were now tossed around, ruffled and more of a mess like his hands had been run through it. One extra button was undone on the shirt that now seemed to be more wrinkled and wrung around then in front of company. 

His glasses were also tossed upside aside on his desk, he didn’t arrive with them. He must have put them on to work, only to toss then off in another act of unknown frustration. The black rimmed frames always made him look handsome, but there was something about looking at him, bent over his desk, an elbow braced on the wood that held his head up in it’s hand. 

Without the glasses you could see his nose, the length of it sliding down his face and making you wonder why he ever could make negatively tinged jokes about it. 

As your feet patted into the room quietly, Marcus snapped his head up. Your name falling quietly from his lips. “You know people are going to notice their guest of honour slipped away.” 

You bowed your head bashfully, a not so sincere smile falling over your face. “Guest of honour’s a bit of a stretch.” You walked more inside properly but chose to lean against the bookshelf between the door and couch. “I’m more like the entertainment.” 

Your fingers tapped anxiously against the shelf. Muted thuds rhythmically filling the gaps of nothing. 

Marcus dropped his pen, running a hand through his hair confirming it was a mess of his own doing. He pushed back in his seat, but didn’t stand up. His arms crossed over his chest as he huffed out. “I’ll talk to them. They should know better.” 

Smiling you looked away, biting your lip sharply and letting it go as you turned back to him. “It’s not a big deal, they just wanted to have fun.” 

You watched his jaw clench again, paired with his brows furrowing and a distant look in his eyes as if looking through not at you. “No it is a big deal.” 

Pushing up you stood straighter ready to fight him on it, temper his nerves. “Sir-” 

The forming of a shiver in your spine crept to the surface when he stood up, body posturing like he was containing an anger inside. He coped your own position, both of you leaning back once more against the desk and shelf, respectively. “You don’t think I see what’s going on?” 

You hoped he didn’t see the gulp that tried to swallow your anxiety. He continued though. “They keep your nickname that those scumbags called you, Granada kicks you off my team,” His knuckles tightening their grip on his desk with the word ‘my’. “Then you leave, and the first time everyone sees you again they treat your abilities like you’re a main attraction at a carnival.” 

Your nails tried digging into the wood with no avail, “It’s fine Marcus. We tried and it didn’t work out, I may as well use it for fun at least.” 

The darkness in his eyes felt like anger, Marcus though wouldn’t ever direct it towards you. A brewing fire was sparking inside but you were given no reason to take shelter. “Do you?” Your eyebrows raised in question. “Use it for fun? Because I’m willing to gamble that you’ve never once used it for anything that would benefit you for the sake of it.” 

Marcus noticed his mistake as soon as you did. His face falling, he fought back a playful eyeroll as you pulled your own expression into an exaggerated mocking look. “Brave choice, gambling with the only person nicknamed for the god of it himself.” 

His jaw twitched as he discreetly licked his lower lip, head turned away from you. Shaking it incredulously, Marcus walked over to a cupboard, bending down to reveal a tiny safe he typed something into. Amusingly though, a cold steam rushed out along with light from a bulb. Just two shelves were inside, one with what appeared to be beer and two different bottles of another kind of liquor, the top one divided between a small stack of juice boxes and cans of soda. 

This time you grinned fully, watching him pull out a taller thin bottle along with two similarly stemmed glasses from the regular cupboard beside it. “Do all good dads keep their whiskey stored with their daughters juice?” 

He plopped everything onto the table before gesturing to the bottle that was in fact much lighter in colour. “Champagne is very different then whiskey I’ll have you know.” Your condescending smirk lightened the mood enough so a matching smirk graced his lips as he nodded his head back to the cupboards. “The other one’s scotch so that doesn’t count.” 

You laughed looking down to your feet before taking a few casual steps towards him, Marcus not moving to poor anything. Just watching you with a patient smile. You felt a little silly in your sparkling dress again. The rich blue the only thing about Marcus’s shirt that made it stand out from every other range of colour he wore of button up. The jeans were dark and blended in well, but as you stood there in something you spent way too much money for?

Well that uncomfortable itch once again rubbed against your skin in annoyance. You felt far too casual for how good he looked in any normal clothes he wore. Even his tactical wear wasn’t flashy or fancy, just dark and normal only attached with gear and not nearly enough armour. 

It wasn’t often you were compelled to fill the lull with words, but his eyes had softened too much towards you to handle. “I uh- just came to check on you. You’ve been gone a while, thought maybe you were trying to get out of the countdown.” 

Marcus shook his head casually, “Not really, I’ve just had my fill of big parties for a while. Our Christmas one wasn’t exactly a walk in the park.” 

Eyes squinting with a head tilt, you found yourself close enough to perch on the back of the chair facing his desk. Still more then arms reach away from him for safe keeping. “I thought..well because you hosted it you would enjoy it?” 

You had seen some of the preparations, but anything you were there to see him work on it he was usually also on the phone arguing with another vendor. “Usually the heads host it, but Granada’s having renovations so it got dumped onto me. Not exactly how I planned on spending the night.” 

Was that guilt you felt once again for not showing up? “Yeah um, Missy showed me the schedule she drew out, told me all about what the movie was supposed to be that day.” You smiled to yourself thinking about it. “I put it on during the morning so she could still have it with someone.” 

That deep intensity in his eyes returned, so you backtracked. Worried you just did exactly what you were trying to avoid. “I didn’t mean, I wasn’t trying to take over your night. I just, she was upset the adults wouldn’t want to watch it during the party and asked if I’d watch it..I wasn’t trying to step on your toes, I know it’s your thing.”

Marcus pushed up from where he leaned on the desk, his arms out slightly to try and coerce you to calm down without coming into your personal space. “Take a breathe, cariño. There we go, you’re alright.” 

You weren’t sure when the room started to spin or when your heart betrayed it’s pattern, but Marcus’s voice was so soothing it pulled it right back down. You nodded as he spoke and took a few deep breaths, his shoulders relaxing as your body did. 

“You’re good with her.” This time you didn’t even nod along to his words to appear polite and civil. There was something about invading in his private life that just kept setting you off. Kept you on a leash and yanked you back every time you started to forget you were here for a job given to you out of convenience. 

“I don’t think there’s been one day after you leave that Missy doesn’t ask why can’t you stay.” He laughs as his hands finds a home on the belt loops at his hips. “And every time shes grumpy when I remind her that you have your own life away from us.” The quiet void in the air was think and suffocating, and Marcus was about to deal the killing blow. 

He moved to pull the stem glasses closer, reaching for something to carefully pull the cork out. You teased him before you could stop yourself. “Isn’t that supposed to be a midnight countdown thing?” 

Marcus smirked, not bothering for any fancy gestures only a simple corkscrew to pull it out. Just like every thing else about Marcus; genuine, refusing to be flashy or show off. “I’ve spilt enough on this carpet. I don’t need to add alcohol to that mix.” 

Tossing the crew out of sight behind his desk, it didn’t occur to you right away the pull and push of a drawer that he didn’t touch. Not flashy. His powers just existed as a part of him. 

Pouring one glass until it was full, you jutted forward starting to protest. Marcus though only poured half. He put the bottle to the side, and gently picked the smaller amount to hand to you. You didn’t like to drink a lot. Not just on an occasion basis, but in amount too. You never told Marcus that, but he knew it all the same. 

Instead of waiting for you, Marcus came to you. His broad body felt like it towered over you with how all encompassing he was. No glasses to obstruct your view of those brown eyes you adored and his mouth just close enough to you that you felt the tail end of his words on you. 

“There’s plenty of ways to celebrate anyways.” 

Your heart constricted, trying not to let the buzzing in your body come from anything deeper. “Judging by the sounds of it, downstairs is about to choose the screaming and yelling option.” 

Sound was more muffled, but in the emptiness of the office floor there was a growing rowdiness in the air. Neither of you were sure what time it was, but honestly it didn’t matter. There was enough alcohol in that party it would say it for you. 

Your eyes narrowed playfully as he brought the glass up to his mouth, “Isn’t the polite thing to make a formal toast, sir?” The sir may have been far more mocking then you’d ever say back when you worked in this very building. 

Marcus just chuckled though. Leaning his lower back against the desk, you didn’t really notice it. But his hand twitched. One part of him wanted to reach out to grab your hand, and pull you close, the other wanted to just pull the metal on your bracelet over so he had an excuse to hold you in his arms to catch you. For now though he chose neither. 

“I’d rather just have your company if that’s alright.” 

Your heart pounded, your nails tapping against the glass as you stood awkwardly. Not knowing where to go or how to sit in case it breaks his air between you. So you nodded, and brought your glasses up together to take a drink. 

Well, Marcus did. You on the other hand bent your head back to swallow the whole thing. Once again, your nails tapped against the glass only now it was empty. Marcus tilted his head before reaching blindly to sit his glass down. 

Pushing up you assumed the hand he reached out was to grab the glass, instead he grabbed the glass with it and turned to put it down as well. While his back was turned though, you felt something non existent tugging at your wrist, tripping you in place only to be grabbed by Marcus smoothly steadying you with one hand on your upper arm and the other on your hip. 

“Do you normally skip giving a girl a little warning?” The play died on your tongue as his fingers slid up to brush your jaw and just under your chin. Tilting it up to look at him better. 

The playfulness was gone from him as well. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean-” 

“I was kidding,” That was true, but your limbs buzzed too much to pretend like there wasn’t a trembling shiver in your body. 

Marcus’s hand tightened on your hip, not painfully but pulling it closer to him so as he stood he was closer to being flush with you. His thumb reached to rub against your cheek. “You’re nervous.” Too close to hide the anxious biting down on your lip, his thumb hopped across your skin to tug your bottom lip free, never moving it away. Just keeping his thumb pressed against the plushness. 

“I want to show you something.” He rubbed his arms over where they were pressed against your body before circling around his desk to pull out a folded sheet of paper. 

Jutting his head to the side, you followed suit. Marcus spoke without prompt. “Missy asked me if we could see Santa this year. She was so excited, had her in a dress with reindeer all over it, I had to settle her down when she was jumping to stand in line all by herself.” 

Your throat choked up at the pure love he felt for his daughter, how even just a cute memory of maybe a week ago had him emotional. You breathed out a light laugh. “She asked me if I wanted her to tell Santa something for me.” 

Marcus twiddled with the edges of the paper, flicking a corner up and down as tore his eyes away from it to look at you, that expression of adoration never changing. “Told her to draw what she wanted for Santa, in case she forgot anything. Refused to show me until after she already saw him.” Slowly he started to unfold it, sure to keep what was on it out of your vision. “She let me keep it though, just in case Santa forgets too.” 

The joking tone made you both laugh. 

Gently he reached the mere foot gap out to hand it to you, the image on the other side still not visible. You didn’t turn it over right away, just held it in your hands. “I’m not sure I should be privy to such confidential information.” 

Marcus didn’t laugh. Choosing to close the gap by a few inches, his hand nudging the paper up. Indicating he wanted you to turn it over. Speaking low and deep as you did so. “You are for this one.” 

It was in crayon. One image dominated the entire paper, two taller figures stood next to each other with the vaguest resemblance to Marcus, and a woman. A mostly stick hand from Marcus reaching out to a smaller figure that was clearly her. Amusingly noted that she gave herself impossibly long luscious locks. 

The female though, the first thing your brain tried to do was place her mothers image onto it. But it just didn’t fit no matter how you shaped it. Her hair a different colour then her mothers up in what Missy tried to draw as a bun at the top of their head. Which you were pretty sure that woman never put her hair up the entire time you knew her. 

The shape didn’t match either. Thin and skinny like a stick drawing suited her mother, but this was drawn to be a child’s interpretation of curvy. Though it looked more like the wave of a waterbed then a human body the intent was clear. 

Under each person was overlapping scribbles of her and Marcus’s name, and yours at the end. The thing that made this a hint of what she wanted though, was what she drew above you. An arrow with a heart mushed into the middle of the arrowhead, and on the other end was “Mama”. 

This time the shaking was obvious to both of you. Your eyes stung as tears were being refused permission to fall and your next breathe was raspy and almost felt like a subdued sob. 

Marcus wasn’t mad, or offended, or upset. He had looked at that drawing with a yearning that you had seen time and time again when Missy wanted you to stay before her dad even came home. You wouldn’t replace her mom, you couldn’t. It wasn’t right. 

So why did Marcus not protest, why did he look so fondly at it, why were his hands cupping your cheeks. “Look at me, cariño.” Your heart was erratic, but you stood calmly. His eyes all too easy to drown in. “No one is pressuring you. I won’t force you to do or say anything,” 

One hand of his left your cheek to grasp one of yours holding the paper. “Missy cares about you, and I care about you.” Gently he guided your hand to place the paper on his desk and then stayed on your waist as your hands nervously hovered between you both. Not knowing what to do. “You can’t imagine how much I care about you, how often I think about you.” 

His grip on your waist tightening, bunching the material up slightly in his hand. His face leaned into you, shocking your system with how soft and warm his face was compared to how gruff and held back his tone came out. “How little I want you to leave every single time I come home and see you with my daughter.” 

The grip on you tightened, and relaxed completely in seconds. Marcus was still holding something back, but those brown eyes begged you of something. “But it has to be your choice. You’ll mean the world to me no matter what but you have to make this decision.”  

The muscles in his chest and stomach tensed as your fingers found the courage to rest there. Not quite yet ready to hold him as he did you, but the racing of Marcus’s own heart spoke to you when your fingers traced around the chest he teased you with. 

There was a terror that rung through you that you were imagining this, that you’d close your eyes and wind up right back where you started. Or worse, that he’d pull away and be kicked to the curb from another part of his life. 

But he was so close. Marcus teasingly nudged his nose against yours and brushing it softly across it, but never moved his lips to you. He wouldn’t do it himself, he wanted you to chose it of your own volition and it didn’t miss you that despite you being the most anxious and worried about these feelings being reciprocated, Marcus was the one who wanted to be sure. 

Timing had a funny relationship with life. Movies and books loved to play the ‘first kiss at the stroke of midnight’ trope, yet there was nothing but the hesitant stuttered breathe in the air as you leaned up. 

Your fingers grasped the edges of his shirt just a tad bit needier, eyes shut as you closed the distance between your lips with the gentlest of brushes. Marcus barley even got a chance to kiss you back, lips brushing together light as a feather. You pulling away just as he was ready to pull you into him properly. 

But you gave him the smallest of touch, still worried even now that you would be reading it wrong. Marcus didn’t feel the same way. His fingers once again found the bottom of your chin as he now much more playfully brushed his nose against yours. 

His arm slid around your waist to pull you closer into him, chuckling at the light grin you gave him. You more confidently pressed your palms onto his chest just as a rowdy noise made itself known from below. 

The distinct sound of counting made you laugh and Marcus to whisper into your cheek, “What?” 

Fingers sliding to his neck to rake themselves into his curls caused Marcus’s eyes to flutter. “Bad timing. We’re supposed to kiss at the end of the countdown.”

Dark eyes seeked something in your gaze, and he found it. Almost as if each movement was tied to the beat of a number, Marcus pushed your hips back into the wall pressing his hips into yours. Hands squeezing the plush skin of your hips that hid from him, your arms filled with lead. A weight tore them from Marcus’s neck and forced them up above your head and the force pressed them there without mercy. 

Metal bracelets, you didn’t even intend anything like it when you put them on. 

Marcus pushed your hips more into the wall, his breathing heavy in your face as he revealed in the shifting your hips wanting, needing more of the growing bulge that pressed into them.

Your eyes looked into each other, the distinct final seconds muffled but understood below. Marcus raised his eyebrows, and you nodded exactly one. 

If he had planned this part out, he was a genius. Just as the yelling of ‘one’ rang out, so did the click of the rooms lock echo in the air. Before the party below could even yell out their celebration, Marcus took charge. 

Pressing his entire body against yours, leaving no room for even a sliver as he pressed his lips roughly to yours. He moved your mouth the way he wanted, the way he could feel you craved. He held nothing back, the sudden roughness came through by the sound of moans, he slightly wet smack as your mouth moulded against his drowned out whatever was happening in the party below. 

Marcus consumed the kiss, pulling your hips into his strained cock behind his jeans as one hand slid behind to grasp at your ass to keep them there. His fingers digging into the cheek so much that he’d have time later to admire such distinct bruises on you.

Your hands were once again pulled in whatever manner Marcus desired. Forcing them up back to his neck, one of them holding you upright as you felt the scratch of his facial hair if you touched high enough. The other raking into his hair, finally allowing you the freedom to touch him as you pleased. And your touch wanted to scratch your nails into his curls. 

Marcus broke away from the kiss as he moaned louder then even he expected, a harsh “fuck,” following suit. He chuckled, moving to hold your chin more firmly. Tilting you up to look at his him. 

His chest was heaving but the much more swollen plush of his lips called to you like a siren. Your attention tried to slide down to trace your fingers down his chest but he kept your eyes on him. Leaving you only able to try and release each button as you found it until his torso was bare. 

Marcus guided your hands in his, helping you gently push the rest of his shirt down his arms until you had to let go. He was so incredibly broad. It felt as if he was taking up your entire field of view leaving you with the only choice of raking your eyes down it. Broad shoulders and back with such strong arms. 

Arms that made your mouth water, those arms and his abilities could render you immobile, it could leave you at his complete control. But what had your lungs hitching was the softer stomach, a realness without any ego or desire to have that strength just to show off in abs. 

No he was soft, and real, and you wanted to reach out to run your hands over his stomach, but he didn’t let you. Stepping back into your personal space he bunched up the sides of your dress, “Gonna let me see what’s under here, cariño?” 

Biting your lip as you nodded, Marcus knelt down in front of you. His hands smoothing over your calves as he pressed his forehead into your hips. He inhaled trying to find any scent of you, agitating him that there were too many layers. 

He was careful though, starting slow. Lifting your foot up comfortably and slid each shoe off of you one by one, then back to running his hands over your legs and up your thighs. He didn’t let the dress obstruct his goal though. You could see the bumps under the material where his hands explored as the callousness of his fingertips tickled the sensitive skin. 

His large, warm hands suddenly grasped the waistband of your leggings and looked up at you with a murmur of your name. The question was not asked but your, “please” was still the answer. 

Marcus slid his fingers inside a tinge more and snagged the ends of your underwear in his grasp as well, still seeking that yes. Your nails ran over his scalp again, and a full body shiver left him this time. A shiver that had him once again pressing his forehead into your hips, and then yanking your bottoms down in one go. 

The abrupt pull had you jump, but Marcus pressed the bottom of your thigh up so he could lift each remaining pant leg off. Your eyes fluttered closed in a held back whine, missing him tossing your leggings out of sight, and standing up as he clenched your underwear in his fist. Your head was thrown back, and he took the chance to shove what was yours into his back pocket. 

“Marcus, I-” You reached out for him to come back into you. Fingers binding together as he leaned in, pushing your body back into the wall with much less force this time. His fingers traced and brushed your bottom lip, “please kiss me.” Your voice much smaller and meeker then you had meant to say it like. 

A smile formed on his lips, both hands cupping your face tenderly as he went in to kiss you. You gripped his sides, thick and strong under your palms. 

He kissed you with less force, but no less demanding. You let him do with you as he pleased, and gave no trouble when he bit your bottom lip. A gasp of pleasure, and he slid his tongue inside your mouth. Tracing along yours and taking each moan that came up your throat. 

One of your arms reached around his neck again and to press his kiss and tongue deeper into your mouth while the other wrapped now around his waist and pulled his hips into you. The bulge rubbing into you, pressure on your clit frustratingly interrupted by both your layers. “Oh god,” 

Marcus bunched the sides of your dress up, only this time more and more of your bare skin reached his touch. His mouth teased you by pulling away, softening his kiss almost too much and pulling away from your lips. His thumb shifted to rub over the skin of your hips without letting your dress fall back down. 

His touch burning in it’s path you let out a whimper, and once again Marcus consumed your mouth, wasting no time in coaxing your tongue to explore. You could feel his breathing grow ragged, and his hips pushing into you aggressively, making you cry out in need. 

In an instance, Marcus’s patience snapped just a little too much, pulling away from your mouth so a trail of saliva followed his pull back. He gave you no time to think as Marcus yanked up your dress and tossed it out of his life. 

You felt so cold and exposed as he shamelessly looked you up and down, “Fuck.” Ambushing you again he wrapped his arms around you and kissed you again. 

His mouth not lasting long, as he kissed and bit down your neck. The burn from his facial hair leaving your already ravaged neck scratched red. Both large hands reached around, squeezing and pulling with a cheek in each hand. His grip on your ass made him push you into his hips as he pressed into yours. 

Gasping out, “Please, I want to feel you.” You reached to his belt and he paused. His adams apple bobbed and your ass slid from his grasp. Kneeling down you cupped the massive bulge in his jeans, kissing and sucking teases to his cock hiding underneath. You couldn’t tear your eyes away from the sight of you undoing his belt, pulling down the zipper. 

Not quite all the way, you pulled his jeans down enough that his cock was released. Right in your face, his tip was red and leaking already, and down from there your eyes widened at the thickness of his cock. Length alone would intimidate you, but his cock was big, so big he’d stuff you full. 

You ran your thumb over his tip, revealing in his moaning and shaking. There was so much precum that you slicked it all over his cock as you stroke him. Slow soft jerks, lubing him up only increasing in speed a fraction each stroke. 

You could tell he wanted you to speed up so badly, you could feel yourself getting wet as you watched your hand try to encompass his cock. Thighs pressing together wasn’t cutting it but you couldn’t stop looking at his cock, your hand refusing to leave either. 

Marcus’s breathing sped up, thighs trembling as you had only just started to stroke his cock anything above slow and teasingly paced. A large hand started to smooth over your hair, his voice coming out in a husk. “Come up here, baby.” 

Gracefully he grasped your hand and helped you stand up, almost like a gentleman would a lady. Just as gentle, Marcus pulled your face in to press his lips against yours. His kiss still full of greed and teeth and tongue, but without the roughness this time. 

Before you realized, his hands grasped your waist and turned your back against the desk. “Hop up.” Just as you tried to hop behind you without looking embarrassing Marcus just grabbed at you, moving you up onto the desk. His eyes memorized by the jostle the quick move bounced in your skin. 

You wanted to trace his own skin but Marcus pulled back to take the rest of his own clothes off. Unsure where to even look, his still slick cock, his soft stomach leading up to his broad large chest, or the bright shine in his eyes, accentuating his face. Your hands grabbed at his waist pulling him to stand between your legs as you slid your palm and nails over his stomach, one of them abandoning the soft issue to slide up the length of his body and cupping the rough brush of facial hair on his cheek. 

“Tell me Moreno, how long has it been since anyone told you how beautiful you were?” Oh that turned him red real fast, the burn in his cheeks a bit of a hint but the blushing design down his chest told an even better story. You smoothed your thumb over the bald patch on his jaw and decided it was exactly where you wanted to kiss him. 

So that’s what you did, leaving your lips to brush against his skin you melt Marcus turn his own head into your neck, leaving a gentle lick and kiss against the bites he just devoured you with. “I’m supposed to be seducing you, cariño. Not the other way around.” 

Thick fingers slid up and down your wet entrance before rubbing at your clit. His hand held you at the back of your neck, keeping you from escaping his mouth as he rubbed circles into you, only leaving just to gather more to keep you nice and wet for him everywhere. 

“You- fuck, you do enough, Marcus. I want to, let me take care of you.” That was the wrong thing to say apparently. His fingers paused, not leaving you clit but ceasing all movement. Instead keeping a steady pressure that had your insides heating up. 

Leaving the back of your neck, he grabbed your chin to force you to look at him. Brows narrowed and a rush fell over you at the serious way he looked at you. “No. You do too much for everyone.” 

Face twisting in confusion, two fingers started to circle your clit again now rough but slow. “I don’t understand.” 

Marcus groaned almost closer to a growl, reaching down to caress your breast, fingers tweaking over your nipple, giving a tug that had you whine. His lips pressed into your jaw and up to you ear as he massaged the sensitive bud. 

“Of course you don’t. You always try to make everyone happy, do everything you think they want. Let me change that, cariño. Please.” Your hand suddenly moved on it’s own from digging your nails into his shoulder blade to the other neglected breast. 

You nuzzled your head closer to his, getting the message you gave a similar treatment to your other nipple, just more apprehensive and gentle then Marcus treated you. He needed you to say it though, he needed to hear you tell it to him. 

You shuddered as he whispered your name into you ear, “Tell me. Tell me you’ll stop. I need you to tell me that you’re going to let me finally take care of you for once. Please?” 

There was a beg in his voice that had you choked up, a desperation to care for you that threatened tears if you said anything more then yes. So that's all you did. “Yes, please.” 

You didn’t even protest that his fingers left your nipple and your clit, instead you sighed out as your foreheads rested against each other, your hands both holding the other at the waist. Marcus lifted his head enough to press a kiss to your forehead and rubbed his nose against yours. “That’s all I’ll ask for okay? That’s all I want, you just like this.” 

Your heart raced as he pulled away, his large hands shoving your legs to the sides even more. His cock bounced in his step as he closed the gap to run the tip over your sensitive clit, and down to smear his precum into your own soaked entrance. 

Marcus gripped the base of his cock and pulled you a tad more to the edge with a hand guiding you on your ass. His cock rubbing up and down, your head thrown back biting your lip to contain a whine and Marcus’s jaw clenched and eyes dark as he watched you both. 

“Look at me.” Commanding, an order, your head flew up to look at him properly like a subject compelled to always follow it’s leader. Brown eyes narrowed as he pushed his cock into your pussy. His gaze watching your gasp, how your mouth fell open from how full he stretched you. It soaked you all that much more how badly he wanted to see you not just feel you. 

You held onto his shoulders tightly as he just pushed inside. Sliding against your warm walls until he was as deep as you could let him be. Your nerves were on overdrive, you could feel so much of him it drove you crazy. “Marcus,”  you managed to whimper out, but that sweet simmer flared back up into an inferno. 

Marcus pulled back before slamming harshly back inside of you, his lips shoving against yours in tandem. Your lips let his tongue explore you however he wanted, all you could focus on was trying desperately to keep up with the pounding of his cock. 

Each slap of his skin against yours may was well been a scream in an echo chamber. It bounced off the walls and back into your ears. You felt that burning need inside you as he slid inside you. Both of his arms wrapped around you as he kissed you

Surprisingly, he used his position to pull you up with him as he sat back in his chair. His cock still deep inside your cunt, slid even further as he bounced you down onto him completely. You cried out and Marcus instantly raked through your hair with gentle shushes. 

Rising up just enough to feel his cock stroke your inner walls so sharply you moaned out his name. Your hips were commandeered as he started to bounce you up and down his cock. The coarse hair around his cock glistened with how much you were soaking his lap. 

Marcus thrusted up against such a sensitive spot inside of you that you clenched hard around his cock. Hard enough that he had to push roughly to let him fuck you deep enough. You pressed a kiss to him, but the bounce of you on his cock made it hard. 

Your breasts bounced just as hard and you felt a deer coiling as his cock pulled intense pleasure from you every slide of his cock. His arms pulled you close to his body, your head resting down on his shoulder as he sped up his pace. Fucking his cock up into you faster as he spat out through gritted teeth. 

“Do you know how many times much I jerked off thinking about you?” Another fiery rush blew through you as you were at the mercy of his cock and his words. Both pounding into you leaving you breathless. “Every night stroking my cock desperately wishing it was you. Angry that I never brought you up to my bed and fucked you so much sooner.” 

“Fuck, I did too, Marcus I did to- oh my god,” Your voice strained into a moan as his hands pulled at your ass cheeks as he fucked into you, the wet squelch of his cock drowning inside of you just had you soaking around his cock even more. And his hard Marcus squeeze his eyes shut trying to force words out through every fibre in his body tensing up in pleasure. 

“Take such good care of my daughter, such good care of me,” The wet slap echoed with the pounding of your skin together as he pulled you towards the edge. “It’s my turn, sweet girl. Cum for me now, and I’ll give you it every single day.” 

His shallow thrusts pushed you over the edge, cumming around his cock and crying his name into his neck. Your back arching as white hot pleasure had you holding onto him for dear life. Unruly sounds clawed their way out of your throat and still his cock fucked your soaked pussy without slowing.

Marcus didn’t let up, fucked you with his cock fast, your ass jiggling from the force. His voice finally pitched, stuttering moans as he grasped your hair. Pulling you up to rub his nose against your cheek, no demanding or teasing.

Just a wrecked moan as you held each other, your ears still ringing as you whined. His voice just as desperate as your pussy felt. Muttering Spanish into your skin, only switching back as he gave final pounding thrusts. His cock throbbing inside of you as his thighs below tensed. “Please, hermosa please.” 

The plea was useless, Marcus hadn’t even finished speaking before he gripped your body so tight his knuckles turned white. His cum spilling inside of you, warm and thick and it seemed to just keep spurting as he slowed his thrusts gradually. 

The dark hair rubbing into your clit and how his cock through everything never let up from the sensitive needy part inside of you had you weightless. Floating in his arms as his own muttering praises sounded underwater. 

Gradually though, you felt him again. Hands through your hair and lips pressing against your head as the water drained. His deep voice relaxed, and his cock keeping his thick cum deep in you. Not yet willing to leave the warmth of your pussy. 

You chuckled a bit, pushing past the lead in your brain holding it down to cup his cheeks. This kiss was the most innocent by far. The one you gave him before was nervous, unsure before he ravaged your lips and your body. 

Now though? You enjoyed a tender press against the other, your body relaxing into his, Marcus content with leaving back in the chair with you on top of his cock like a blanket. 

For a while you stayed that way, neither of you feeling any rush to move. No one was going to walk in, and for once, neither of you needed to sacrifice time together for anything else. You kept his cock inside of you, his thickness pushed so deep inside of you kept your nerves alight, and your own walls surrounding him kept Marcus unwilling to let you go. 

“Come home with me.” Your head rushed up to look at him with questioning eyes. “At least for tonight? Missy’s with my mom until tomorrow afternoon.” 

His cheeks were wide as he smiled at you. “I’m selfish, I want to keep you with me for a while.” His hips shifted to tease you, knowing even his cock when soft was still large and thick. “Even if it’s mostly in my bed.”  

You grinned at him, “Now sir, isn’t it a bit cliche to start sleeping with the nann-” You yelped in a laugh as Marcus tickled your sides. 

He held his own smile, unobstructed by anything weight either of you down from days precious. “Don’t start that. You keep calling me sir, and I’m going to start treating the way a sir would.” His eyes were lustful but he jumped to tickle one last spot. Both of you laughing as you ended up collapsing into his chest rather then pulling away from him. 

“Is it okay though?” 

Marcus looked up to you, his thumb over your bottom lip again as you clarified. “Is it okay to come over- stay over I mean. I just don’t want Missy thinking...” 

Marcus captured your lips in another chaste kiss. “Missy asked Santa if he could make you her mom for Christmas. I think we’re well past you needing to worry about your place in our lives.” 

You knew he meant it this time. There was an affection in his eyes for those he loved, a soft kindness that shined through every aspect about him. But there also was a tiny possessive voice in the back of his head you were starting to understand. 

One that he let out as he fucked you, but also maybe a quieter one that associated possessiveness over you to wanting to ensure you knew you belong. Neither of you were people who felt things lightly, and the time it took to tear your lips apart long enough to even pull his cock from your pussy spoke miles about how little either of you wanted to pretend otherwise anymore. 

To the parties credit, no one really noticed in the end that you left. They also didn’t notice that Marcus had an arm around you the entire time, holding your coat out to put over you. Nothing but an empty parking lot also got to witness Marcus’s rare moment of embarrassment. 

Both of you had debated where to stop and grab something to eat. Stuck between two options, Marcus did what Missy always tried with him. Rock, paper scissors. It took 5 whole tries for him to remember how stupid he was. You didn’t even glance at your hands whatsoever the entire time. Just watching him with a fond but amused expression as he looked up from your constant wins to your smug smile.

Lucky indeed that no one was around to notice him growling out what a brat you were as he gave you a greedy kiss, pushing you up against his car in another lack of self control. 

They didn’t need to know right now. You cared about them, but it was also a memory of a life you never got to live up to. 

The rest of the night truth be told was uneventful. You ate some late night garbage, and didn’t make it much further then Marcus helping you both get ready for bed. Only stopping briefly to pull you back into his chest, watching you brush your teeth in the mirror draped in one of his tee shirts. Your head nuzzled back into him as he leaned and pressed greedy kisses into your neck. 

You passed out in his arms rather quickly. Marcus though, watched your peaceful face for a while. Stroking your hair as he did so. 

He wondered if he should feel guilty for how perfect this felt, how perfect it worked out. He found you hoping to guide you into a companionship in the very team he leaded, only to watch your dreams crumble while the facade of his happy marriage finally exposed itself. 

He laughed to himself, your smug little smirk as he realized how much you just played him for laughs. A way you hadn’t used your ability in longer then he could think of. Maybe it was a start. 

Marcus didn’t work in the field for the Heroics anymore, and you were finding a life outside of that at the same time. If he weren’t needy or selfish, Marcus would feel guilty for how his love only found yours through your dreams dashed. 

But, you used your ability in the parking lot with him, not to play entertainment, not to be a useful spectacle. No you did it just for fun, to make you giggle and you laughed even harder seeing that he was just as cutely amused as you were. 

It was a step in the right direction, and now you both had each other to support that from now on. Missy as well. God knows the second she found out about you both, Marcus knew she was going to try and throw a parade about it. 

She didn’t see you as trying to replace her mother, neither did Marcus and neither did his own mother. Missy started to call you mom nervously when you weren’t around, and Marcus slipped up more then once about it as well.

So he pulled you close into his chest more. Kissing your sleeping forehead, before nuzzling into you back. Your arms wrapped around each other was the best take away from this night there could be.

You were part of their family now, part of their love. That’s all that mattered. 

[roonyxx]

The Raven: Part 9

Summary: A new threat to the world brings the boys back in action. She is big and bad, very bad. But is everything as it seems or is there more to her story?

Pairing: Dean x reader

Trope: enemies to lovers

Word count: 1868

Chapter warnings: language, a heavy dose of angst, anger, tears, a dash of violence.

A/N:  We are nearing the end! hope you enjoy, i go hide now.

The Raven Masterlist

My Masterlist

Buy me a coffee

“I think I fell in love with your eyes first. At first glance they seem like any other pair, but pay closer attention and you can see all the flecks and colors combining into something so unique. I could look at them forever.” I say as I brush her hair back behind her ear, careful to not mess it up.

“Those big beautiful y/e/c eyes, they pulled me right in. I was so distracted that I didn’t even see the punch coming my way.” I look at her and laugh, a few chuckles can be heard around us but all my focus is on her. “You have a mean right hook, baby.”

“I though you were a shifter! Don’t leave out the important, they will think you’re marrying a crazy woman.” She quickly adds.

“The only crazy here is me about you.” I wrap my arms around her waist and tug her close to kiss her. A few flashes go off and I’m sure it’s Jody taking a picture of us.

“My speech sucks, you know I have always been more of a do-er than a talker but Y/n, you are my everything, my sun, my moon, the love of my life. There is no tomorrow without you. I love you.” I finish my lame speech with another kiss and I can feel the wetness on my face from her tears. I cup her face and gently wipe the tears away.

“That didn’t suck at all baby” she cups my face.

“Forever I will love you, I will love you until we’re nothing but dust between the stars and I will never leave your side. It’s you and me, forever. I don’t want tomorrow without you. I love you too.”

She crushes her lips onto mine and our friends and family erupt into cheers and whistling. We are covered in little white petals when we walk between our friends on our way to the car who will bring us to the bar.

Y/n is smiling so bright and I can’t stop looking at her.

I am so happy.

Until I fall to my knees with an explosion of pain in my chest, and the last thing I see is Y/n crying and screaming my name.

Then nothing.

“You FOOL!” before I can process what I just remembered after what Cas said, R is on him.

Her body changed to her horror corpse, she’s chanting and curling her hands. Sam and I are slammed back by the force she’s using on Cas.

I can feel the rage rippling of her in waves, it is making the bunker shake.

Enormous clouds of black and purple smoke fill the ceiling, she calls them down to wrap around Cas.

I jump into motion, using every ounce of strength to push against that barrier of her power. My first two steps slip away, but my third holds and so does my fourth.

With small pushing steps I come near.

“RAVEN STOP!” I yell over the tumbling smoke, but she’s lost in her rage. She’s leaning over Cas, her nails gripping his jacket and holding him up while she let her smoke work.

I can see her face, her eyes, the sockets are glowing bright orange, like her insides are on fire.

I push through and get near enough to grip her arm. The moment I touch her, her head snaps in my direction. I can feel the heat of that fire deep inside her, but I do not back down.

“Y/n, stop.” I say, keeping my grip tight, preparing for her next blow, preparing for the sting of her nails, preparing for her denial.

But it never comes.

She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath, her body transforming back to her regular one. The smoke disintegrates and the bunker stops trembling.

She opens her eyes and looks away from me to the unconscious Cas, with a wave of her hand she heals him, his eyes open and look at her, terrified.

She steps away from him, saying nothing.

“Wait!” I go after her, stopping her, “You’re not leaving, you need to explain, what- what happened.”

She turns to me, slowly and looks up at me, into my eyes.

“You remember.” Is all she says.

“I do.”

“Then I don’t need to explain anything. I need to go.” She turns away again.

I grip her arm and tug her back, “No! I’m not letting you leave. I can’t.”

“What is going on, why did you call her Y/n?” Sam asks.

I don’t turn away from her, I gently reach up and take off her sunglasses. Her eyes are down cast.

“Y/n, please look at me.” I ask softly.

Her eyes look up, they’re filled with water from tears but I can see it. I caught a few glances of them before but now that I have time to look closer I can see how unique they are.

“That’s why you took them out? Why you’re wearing the glasses? To hide them.”

“I knew you would see right away, I had no other choice. I- couldn’t… tomorrow was gone, Dean.” She looks at me and lets her tears flow freely, “Nothing was right, I had nothing. Nothing mattered because you died, again.”

Sam came closer, realization setting in his eyes. “You’re Y/n… you did this.”

“What do you mean, again?”

“This was the thirteenth time I lost you.” She breathes out, “Thirteen times I had to say goodbye, build a pyre, wrap and burn your body, console Sam and our friends, live without you. I always found a way to bring you back. Selling my soul, going back in time, asking God, necromancy…

I don’t want a world without you in it. So I broke it to save you, and every time, I gave up a part of me, I became someone- something else.

We fell in love every time and every fucking time you died within the next five years.” She takes a shaky breath, I can see she’s digging through painful memories and my chest aches for her. I don’t remember any of that…

“And I- I thought it worked.” She continues, “We were happy for over five years, you asked me to marry you and it finally felt safe to say yes. And on our wedding day… you got shot by some drunk nutjob.” She sobs and falls to her knees, her hands clinging to her chest.

I go to my knees to touch her but she starts talking before I can, and the look on her face is pure rage.

“I had enough.” Her jaw clenches with rage, “I was sick and tired of the universe taking what’s mine again and again. So I took something from it, and became the first Visata.”

“Visata?” Sam asks, “What is that.”

“It is a universe witch. I control the rules now. I am the beginning and the end.” She looks at me with such a determination.

“How is that possible.” Cas breathes out as he stands up, “Even God couldn’t do that.”

“Because God wasn’t as desperate as I. And I was ready to pay the price.” She answers.

“What price, what did you pay Y/n?” I stand up. she had already sold her soul once, faced off God, became a necromancy witch. She had done horrible things for me…

I can’t imagine what can be worse.

She stands up too and looks at me.

“Me.” She breathes out, “I could become the new game maker, if I decided to become a monster. If I agreed to be the villain. So that Dean Winchester, the ultimate hero, would never love me.”

I look at her. At this ‘monster’. “You’re not a monster.” I tell her.

“I killed people to get where I am.” She standing straight, her face void of emotions.

“They must have deserved to die, because you are not evil.”

“I am. I broke the universe because I am selfish and cannot live in a world void of you.”

I shake my head, I can feel her lie in the air. I step closer and touch her hands, “I’m not dying again.”

She pulls her hands away, “You already did, once we did more than just touching and you died. We can never be together Dean. I’m a monster. I just… I need to fix this and you can go on living your life.” Her hand reaches up to my forehead.

“What are you doing” I step back.

“Making it easier, if you don’t remember any of this, you will be safe.” Tears are rolling down her beautiful face again.

“No! I don’t want to forget you! I-I love you.”

She freezes, “Don’t say that.” Her eyes are wide, ready to fight death itself.

“I do. I love you.” I look straight into her beautiful eyes.

“There is no tomorrow without you.” I say.

A sob breaks through and she lowers her hand, “I can’t loose you again. I can’t Dean. If you die now, now that you know, I won’t be able to stop it. I can’t stop time. I tried, I tried so hard.”

“You brought me back before, the universe is under your rule now, make new rules.” I tell her.

She shakes her head, “I did, but Death can't be controlled and Time doesn’t listen. I can bend it, pause it even, but never stop. As long as you don’t remember, you stay in this time line. You can live.” She pleads with me.

“So you’ll erase my memories and disappear? I don’t get a choice? We can figure something out.”

“WE CANT, I tried everything! This is the only way.” she clenches her fists, “Please Dean…”

I look at her as I try to think of another way, any way.

“I don’t want to loose my memories of you. I felt empty and lonely before you, and I didn’t know why. I don’t want to feel like that ever again.”

“You know the consequences, you could die when we get too close and this time I can’t bring you back.”

“Excuse me? You died?! When!” Sam asks.

“Not now, Sam.” I snap back.

“What are my other options. There has to be something.”

She searches my face, as if the answer will be on it.

“I leave, and we never see each other again. And you control your thoughts, dreaming is okay, but not when awake. Do you understand?”

“But…” I start.

“It’s the only other way to keep your memories and be safe.” She cuts me off.

I slowly nod, “If that’s the only other option, then… yes.”

She looks at me for a second in silence, baffled that I said yes to never seeing her again. My heart breaks at the flash of hurt across her eyes.

She nods and wipes her hands down her shirt, trying to compose herself.

“Then this is goodbye.”

“Goodbye Y/n, I will always love you.”

I can see more tears streaming down her cheeks before she disappears.

“Sam,” I start.

“Yeah?” he hesitantly answers.

“When is a monster not a monster?” I turn to look at him, my eyes blurry with tears.

He doesn't answer me.

“When you love it.”

“You have an idea?” he asks me?

“Of course I do.”

Forever Tags 2023: @jay-and-dean @flamencodiva @magssteenkamp @snowlovespie @awkward-and-indecisive @hobby27 @yvonneeeee (yvonne, your tag doesn't work, check your settings if it is allowed)

Dean tags 2023: @akshi8278 @brilovesdeanwinchester @mrspeacem1nusone @pink-sparkly-witch @verytoadpapersoul @eevvvaa @alwayskeepfightingsweetheart @supernatural79impala @thoughts-and-funnies

The Raven: @globetrotter28 @jerome-valeska-trash @deans-spinster-witch @sassy-pelican @jamerlynn @pallographsunspot (tag also not working, check your tags) @nancymcl

(I will be removing tags who don't interact with me (a reblog is all it takes) tags are a lot of work and most of these are blogs who haven't been active in a while, if your name is bold and cursive, it means you're on the exit list, dm/ ask me is you want to stay.)

You can support me here if you loved it :D

[thetriplets3]

✻ with you ✻

Ever since we met I've been drawn towards you. Maybe it's because I can relate to you or it's just the calming, safe aura you have. One of my favorite things about you is that you are always there no matter what. You love knowing that I feel safe enough to come to you because you know it's not easy for me. It took me a while to get out of my shell, some days are harder than others but you understand and you are always there for me.

Letting myself into your apartment, trudging past Nick and Chris in the living room without greeting them I head straight to your room. They know this is typical of me and I'll say hi to them at my own time but right now I need you. Quietly I tap on your door only to be met with your smiling face. You instantly bring me into the most welcoming, safe hug. With your arms wrapped tightly around my shoulders my cheek squished into your hoodie and my arms around your body like my life depends on it.

You gently shuffle us into your room and close the door as you do so. You slowly start swaying us side to side, almost like we're slow dancing without the music.

“Can we stay like this forever?” I whisper so quietly you barely hear it.

You say nothing just squeezing me tighter and planting a loving kiss to the top of my head, I let out a small sigh trying to release any bit of anguish I can. I pull away ever so slightly to rest my chin on your chest looking up at you with a small pout on my lips. I watch as a gentle frown replaces your content smile as your bright eyes meet my sad ones.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” You gently ask in the most caring voice ever I can almost feel my heart shatter.

I only shake my head in return knowing if I try to speak I'll just cry. You pull my head back into your chest and rest your one hand on the back of my head, gently stroking it. It's rare that I actually express what's going on. Growing up I was always a bubbly carefree child no one would have guessed that I would be dealing with my own inner turmoil as I became a teenager. Mental health was never a topic of discussion in my house and I never knew how to bring up how I felt. Trying to explain something so complex and personal to someone knowing they'll never be able to understand what you feel is the most challenging and painful thing. So instead I pretend like everything is all fine and dandy until I fall apart and go to you to help put me back together.

“Do you want a distraction?” You ask with a suspicious smile replacing your pitied frown.

“Yes please” I say breaking out of the hug we've been in for who knows how long.

You head to your closet, grabbing me a hoodie to throw on since I didn't have time to put one on before coming over in a hurry. You grab your keys and we head out after you tell Nick and Chris we're going out for a bit. I feel bad that I haven't said anything to them yet but right now my focus is solely on you. You open the passenger side door for me with a bow of your head making me giggle. As you head to your side you proudly smile to yourself for putting a smile on my face. You drive off without telling me where we're going. I don't mind though being in the car driving through the city at night when the traffic has died down is one of my favorite things to do, especially if it's with you. As we pull into a 7-eleven I shoot you a confused look.

“Slushies make everything better” you say as you take my hand in yours and lead me to the slushie machines.

Once we get our flavors we're back to driving through the city. I roll the windows down just enough to feel a breeze. You reach over and grab my hand, linking it with yours pressing a kiss to the back of my hand. I can't help my cheeks growing slightly pink as I look out at the LA skyline. We parked at the top of a hill and stayed in the car to finish our slushies. I unbuckle and sit sideways in my seat so my full attention is on you.

“Thank you Matt” my voice is full of sincerity and love.

“You don't need to thank me for anything” you say.

“No but I do. You're always the person I go to when things aren't right and you never for a second question me. I’ve never felt more at peace than when I'm with you. You understand me like no one ever has before. I don't know I guess you're just comforting to be around and I don't tell you enough that I love you” I confess.

“You don't know how happy it makes me to know that you feel safe with me. You know I'd go to the end of the world for you if it meant you were happy. I love you more than you'll ever understand” you say ever so gently, truly meaning what you say.

“All I know is that I'm much happier when I'm with you and I never want that to stop. I love you more than you'll ever understand Matt” I confess.

We stare at each other for what feels like an eternity, processing that we've confessed our love for each other. This time instead of a kiss to my hand you pull me in by my chin and gently kiss my lips. It's moments like these with you I cherish. Now in a much better mood than I arrived in, we head back home. We enter the apartment holding hands and the stupidest smiles on our faces. I finally greet Nick and Chris before we say our goodnights.

With you, nothing else matters.

@iluvmatt @stxrniqlo @im-a-matt-girl @antisocialties

[may-bee-its-just-me]

personal life update

Hey yall, i figured i'd take some time to give a personal life update as well as allow myself to vent for a second. I'll start with the positives for those not interested in the emotional bits :]

I've been making more substantial steps towards buying a car! I've been looking into this one Saturn, and while it's got a few minor issues, it's still my best option so far. Hoping to buy it for 2000, or 2500-3000 if the seller is willing to continue fixing the current known issues.

I've also been growing a bit closer to God, and I've been finding peace among the chaos. I'm learning to lean on Him for support - which has been an uphill battle against myself and the feeling I need to cling onto what i can control, but when i have been able to let go it's been very freeing. I'm still working on myself and growing in Christ, but progress is progress.

I recently got promoted to Crew trainer (about a month or two ago). I'm now making 75 cents more an hour than I did this time last year, after two biannual performance reviews and a promotion. I heard rumors that I'd been in consideration for a management position but I havent been talked to about it specifically, and I'm not sure if I'd accept if offered it. Still flattering to know though :]

Apparently more than once, customers have spoken to my managers and possibly even some higher ups praising my work ethic. I think its specifically when working on front counter/in lobby, as I'm most actively engaging with customers then and they can see me compulsively scanning over lobby for trash when im otherwise not busy. Regardless, it's nice to know I'm making a genuine positive impact on customers' experiences and potentially the rest of their days. Today, one such pair of customers is an older couple known for being very particular, occasionally rude/difficult to serve. They had already called our regional manager that day to complain before I was moved up front, saw them, and said hi. Later on one of my managers came up to me and had mentioned they liked me, and I assume said something to them about it. :]

On the flip side, i've been in a depressive funk for several months now. I'm actually questioning if it's a depressive funk, or if I'm always depressed and sometimes it's just...not as bad. But the last few weeks have been worse. I'm struggling to take care of myself, and while it's not as bad as it has gotten before - I went three days without showering this week and lately i've been routinely skipping showers after maintaining showering almost daily for a year.

For the last few weeks I keep going back and forth between losing my appetite, and eating myself into feeling sick. I'm pretty sure this is from grief and will pass though.

My boyfriend broke up with me 3 weeks/almost a month ago. For reasons, although there wasn't any real conflict between us during the relationship, it was more internal conflict and convictions. We'd been getting distracted with each other, putting off other things to spend time with each other. He needed to focus on his health and figuring his life out. Part of me still wants to cling onto hope he'll come back around, wants to go back and fight back against his reasons for leaving, because I damn know he still cares about me more than friends. But I'm trying to just trust that if we're meant to be, God will bring us together again naturally when we're ready for it. Trying to focus on getting my shit together on my end, and let Him figure the rest out. We're still friends, and through the relationship we were always friends above all else, so I'm thankful to still just have him in my life. I'll be okay, but the grief does eat away at me sometimes. I thought I had been recovering from it pretty well, but that was suppression (oops). I keep going back and forth from feeling okay about it, and feeling like a piece of me is missing. I even get mad at him from time to time, blaming him for my hurt feelings. "You promised forever" "you actively encouraged me to open up and lean on you, encouraged me to share my burdens with you, and now im supposed to just be okay with that ripped away" and then i see him, and i remember its not his fault, and he's always had my best interest in mind. Even in breaking up with me, he was doing out of the place of wanting what was best for both of us, and thought I deserved someone who already had everything together and wasnt a mess in himself. I know he genuinely meant every word he said in the moment, because i saw him. I saw it in his eyes. I saw it in his actions. I found the card he gave me for my birthday, and it made me cry, because it hurts my heart to think he's breaking both of our hearts needlessly. But everything happens for a reason, and so I'm trying to just...go with the flow of wherever this season of my life takes me. It hurts to think of either of us moving on with someone else, but whatever happens happens. I have so much love to give, and it's a challenge to find somewhere in the tangible physical realm to put it.

Silver lining, he said I can keep the shirt and hoodie he had let me borrow before. I've been wearing his hoodie everywhere...The only thing stopping me from still carrying my promise ring around is the sensory issues that caused me to stop wearing it to work in the first place.

The few coworkers I've told are convinced we're going to get back together soon, but again, trying to trust God and not my own hopes and dreams lol At the very least, no one can gossip about the break up because they can still see us laughing and getting along fine at work. A different couple had briefly broken up, and the amount of gossip that was floating around was awful - everyone talking trash about either person involved because there was a lot of friction between them. I'm just glad that wont be the case for us, and if we don't reunite anytime soon, at least we can still function at work more or less normally.

thats all tonight folks. Thanks for reading, God bless.

-Mod Bee🐝

[dark-frosted-heart]

Fake Wedding Event - Roger Barel (main)

In Roger's lab, Jude tells the quack former doctor that he needs better bedside manners and treat him with more care. Roger counters that he should avoid blades then. Sourpuss.

Jude: Excuse me (╬ಠ益ಠ)?

Ellis agrees. Apparently Jude gets into a sword fight every 3 days. Roger's like 'yeah, you tell him Ellis'. Jude reminds Ellis who he works for and Roger notices that Ellis is also injured. Liam then appears and asks if Roger's around.

Roger: What now? D:<

Yeah, Liam's also injured. Though he feels bad because Roger's already busy with treating Jude and Ellis. Roger instructs Kate to stop the dumb cat's bleeding with a clean cloth. He's about to tell her to lift his arm above the heart, but Kate finishes the sentence for him.

Wait, why is Kate helping out in the first place? Though she supposes that it's convenient for her job as the fairy tale writer. It's not the first time she's helped out, but she doesn't appreciate being treated like a dog.

Another voice asks if Roger's around.

Roger: Damn it, who is it this time?

William: Hm?

~~~~

Apparently William has a mission for both Roger and Kate. Back upstairs, the two talk about how surprised they were to see William since he doesn't usually visit the former's lab with an injury. William chuckles and offers to come by next time with a missing arm. If anyone's capable of taking his arm, Kate would love to see it, she thinks.

William tells the two about a rumor that's been going around among couples in London. The rumor about an organization called "Amour" and how if you get married with them, your love will last forever. But all the couples that have gone to Amour were never seen again. William and Victor had done some investigating and found that the leader, a man who calls himself the "guru", was guilty. It's likely that he killed the couples and took their money.

Roger asks why they haven't been able to convict him yet. William explains that the guru only appears during wedding ceremonies. From that, Kate deduces that she and Roger will be going undercover as an engaged couple to draw the guru out. Yep. And then condemn him. Roger asks why he was chosen for the mission and William replies that the Queen said his ears would be useful. And he'll be rewarded with Legend beer. There's a change in the former doctor's eyes.

Roger: Hold on, are you serious...?

It's a German beer he's been wanting to try. Welp, it's been decided. They're getting married. Roger drags Kate to the common room where they discuss their cover story and how they're going to act like an engaged couple. Kate feels like she's losing to beer, but she better focus on the mission. Since they can't go with their current professions, Roger's going to be posing as a boxer and Kate a postwoman. Kate asks why boxer and he replies that it's his hobby. Well that explains the muscles for Kate. The more she learns about Roger, the more gaps there are.

Now to decide on how they met. Kate suggests a story where Roger saved her when she was getting harassed while delivering mail and they've been dating ever since.

Roger: Oh, you're into that kind of thing, little lady? Kate: It's not like that!

Roger agrees to go with Kate's idea. Now all that's left is answering what they like about each other.

Roger: Your hobbies include crying- Kate: No it's not!

Kate likes to watch plays and eat delicious food. Roger on the other hand isn't interested in art. It's not something that clicks with him. Going back to the original topic of answering what they like about each other if they were asked...Roger asks Kate what she likes about him. She's too distracted by his (oddly sexy) gaze to answer immediately. That leads to Roger saying that if she can't answer, he'll spell it out for her. He then says that he wouldn't mind sleeping with her, but then they'd be sleep-deprived for their mission tomorrow. And then Roger starts to laugh at the look on Kate's face. She can't act like his fiancée if she looks so upset at that.

Roger tells Kate to just name his strengths or something. Kate can't help but feel frustrated at how she's been playing into the palm of his hand so she focuses on what kind of person Roger would like. A woman who can think for herself and looks good when she cries? Looks like she knows him well, how impressive. Looks like they'll be able to get through tomorrow.

~~~~

The next day, the two go to Amour where they're greeted by followers dressed in pure white who're going to test their love for each other. Only those that truly, truly love each other are allowed to marry and meet the guru. Luckily, the tests were as the pair had expected and they're able to answer the questions without an issue. Things were going smoothly until they got to the last part of the test where they have to kiss each other lovingly. Roger turns Kate to face him and as she's internally panicking, he kisses her on the forehead. He then explains to a follower that his lover's really shy. There'll be plenty of kisses at night when they're alone. The sincere smile on his face is one that Kate's never seen before; the care and concern Roger has for her moves the followers and now they're recognized as a couple truly in love. The wedding will happen the next morning so until then, they're free to pass their time however they like.

They still need to do some digging on Amour so Kate asks if it's alright for them to do some volunteer work to pay back the organization recognizing their love. A follower gladly accepts the help. Now she'll have the chance to enter rooms that only followers are allowed in. Kate wonders if just volunteered without talking to Roger about it first, but when she takes a glance at him, she sees a smile on his face as if telling her that she did a good job. It makes her a bit giddy.

When the two are out of earshot of the followers, Kate thanks Roger for looking out for her earlier. Roger replies that he didn't want to get pushed away all of a sudden. Next time, he'd like her to put on a more sexy expression. Contrary to his tone, the large hand that pats her head is somewhat tender. This man's really sending mixed messages and messing with Kate's head.

~~~~

Some time later, Roger returns to Kate after doing some investigating between volunteering. He picked up all sorts of information just by wandering about. The couples are killed after falling unconscious from drinking wine drugged with sleeping pills at the end of the wedding ceremony. And the guru really is the one killing everyone. The bodies of the couples can be found in the basement too. It's hard for Kate to imagine that the guru acted alone though. Roger explains that while the followers don't participate in the murders, they condone it because they see it as salvation. Perhaps they were suffering in despair before joining the organization. They'd cling to anything to survive, regardless of how messed up the thing is. Just because the heart's still beating doesn't mean a person's alive.

The way Roger talks about this feels as if he's experienced it himself. Kate asks if he too has ever felt absolutely hopeless in the past. Roger looks at her in silence for a second before answering that he hasn't. He was born with a strong body and spirit. Kate chuckles at that response. It's just like him to say something like that. And it's true, Kate's never seen the man get shaken up by anything. An egoist who lives by his own convictions, that's how she sees him.

But was it really possible for someone to be this strong since the start, Kate wonders. What if they had no choice? What can she do for them? Wait, why does it sound like she wants to be useful to Roger?

~~~~

After the sun sets, the two go to the room they'll be staying in and see a large box on the bed. To Roger, it looks like a bomb going by the size and shape. He's just joking. It's actually a present from him to her. Kate opens the box and sees a jet black wedding dress. Roger had bought the dress ahead of time and had it sent over. Victor had told him about the shop. Kate asks why and Roger responds that blood won't stand out on a black dress. Kate clarifies that she wants to know the reason why he prepared the dress. She's starting to fit into her role as the fairy tale writer. She's learned to think for herself and stand on her own two feet so it's a reward for her. She can try on the dress now if she wants to. Kate finds herself at a loss of words before managing to get a 'thank you' out. She'll try on the dress to make sure it fits.

~~~~

Kate walks out into the hall while holding the dress close and breathes out. She never thought she'd be rewarded like this for her hard work. And it's thanks to Roger, who has helped and watched over her despite also toying with her. Kate then comes to a realization. She wants to be someone who can help Roger the same way he's helped her. That she can be someone he can be more vulnerable around, someone he can be sad around.

~~~~

The next day, the fake wedding ceremony begins. Roger and Kate stand in the chapel with the followers as their witness. And the guru's made his appearance to officiate the ceremony. When the guru has them say their vows, Roger interrupts. He's not going to say his vows while lying. Kate agrees. Suddenly, like dominoes, the followers collapse on the spot one after another.

Bitter End

Premium End

[oubliette-odette]

The Reluctance of Love Pt. 9

Orc Male x Half-Elf Male, Fated Mates, Forbidden Love, Slow Burn Part 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 Word Count: 2160 (average 16 min read) Content Warnings: mention of mating, nothing happens....yet ;) All orcish is from orcishdictionary.com, created by Matt Vancil. Not beta-read. Criticism is welcome, but be sure to distinguish criticism from hate.

I looked for Altan everywhere, but I could not find him. I was at the market every morning looking for him. The vendors grew annoyed at my presence every morning. They told me I was bad for business with my grim expression. I didn’t really pay them any mind because I was too concerned about other things.

I told myself to stop worrying, that Altan clearly had just moved on now that things were done between us. I knew he had left home to get away from his father - or at least I assumed that from the way he talked - and I knew he likely couldn’t stay here forever. I had just hoped that all of those talks we had would mean something more…that maybe I could take the time to get to know him more.

I reopened my forge, tried to resume my work, but found that my mind would always stray to Altan and my hand would go up to the vial on my neck, playing with it. There was just this nagging feeling.

I was useless, completely useless. I found nothing could keep my focus for longer than a few minutes. My mind started to paint a different picture. What if Altan hadn’t left by choice? What if something was wrong? Something was telling me not to rest, not to settle down until I found him. 

I finally grew desperate enough to ask some of the inns around if they knew of him. Each one would consider me warily before answering. 

Luck would find me after a couple days of this, when the wife of one of the innkeeper’s pulled me down to take a seat and tell me all about the sweet boy she took care of that matched Altan’s description exactly. She handed me a piling plate of food - told me I looked like I could use it - before she told me all about how he would come and play at nights for the tenants.

“He had such an angelic voice. He sounded just like one of those glorious elves I hear about.” She reminisced. “He hid himself in his room for almost a week after a certain point. I left food at his door, and when he came out, he was a sorry mess.” She shook her head, her voice turning morose, “Not long after that, some official men came looking for him. They told us that he was the son of a duke. They grabbed his things and went and found him at the bathhouse and I suppose he’s back home.” She shook her head again. “He really was such a sweet young man.”

I felt my blood grow cold at the news of Altan being taken by his father’s people. His father was a Duke, a man of high rank. That meant Altan was also a noble. Immediate feelings of inadequacy and shame overwhelmed me. Who was I to Altan if nothing more than a distraction from his comfortable life? Maybe I was nothing more than a dalliance for the summer. I left the inn, feeling deflated and unsure what to do next.

I couldn’t sleep that night, my mind still stuck on Altan. I could swear that I was still experiencing lordhovid with all the time I was consumed thinking about him. I was worried. Genuinely worried. He didn’t say hardly two words about his father…but somehow I knew, I just knew that it meant something bad for him to be going back to him. He must have run away for a reason.

He had told me how much he had admired me and how I was his first friend. I couldn’t take any of that lightly. If he needed help, I might be the only person who could help him. 

The next day, I found myself stepping into the town’s library for the first time ever. The librarian looked at me with reluctance and disbelief that an orc would be in a library of all places. I ignored their ignorant comments, “Do you have any family charts of the Dukes that rule around here?” 

“What would you need it for?” The librarian asked.

“Do you have one or not?” I pressed, my tone impatient. 

The librarian’s eyes widened in fright and scurried away, returning with a book from a few years back that lists all of the Noble family names throughout the continent. 

I was still not the best at reading the common language, so I borrowed a paper and quill and wrote Altan’s name out so I could see exactly what it looked like and then my finger trailed over the lists, looking for any matches. The librarian watched me closely as I studied each name, one by one. I finally stopped when I found his name under the Family Hilmar. I ran my finger across his name again and again. Altan Hilmar. Altan Hilmar. His father was Taliesin Hilmar of Berdusk. His mother Telmira from Evermeet. A sun elf. 

The librarian aided me with a copy of a map that I studied finding the paths that would take me to Berdusk and I left with the librarian watching me with disbelief. 

The next day, I closed my forge again to the dismay of all my neighbors and customers and I was on the road again, this time with the intent to find Altan. I hoped that maybe seeing him would help me make sense of all of the feelings and thoughts I kept having about him and maybe I could help him too. 

The maps I followed that led me to Berdusk made the travel look straightforward. I kept to the main roads most of the time. I found my hand on the vial more and more often as my mind strayed to Altan through my walking. He was the main occupying thought in my brain. How was he? Was he safe? Is he happy? Am I wrong to do this? What if this is all a fools’ errand? Will he be happy to see me? What will I do when I see him? I pondered that last one a lot and I couldn’t deny that my arms around his waist was a frequent vision in my head. I still wondered what that would feel like.

When I entered the gates of Berdusk, not more than 6 days later, I noticed that most people’s eyes fell on me. It was not much of a diverse town. They were mainly human and they all seemed to watch me with a wary gaze. I caught one eye of a dragonborn who looked at me with an understanding nod. I nodded back before passing on and making my way towards the first inn I could spot. 

“We don’t make beds for folks like you.” The innkeeper said, glaring.

I nodded, “I’ll pay for a room with two beds then.”

“Don’t got any of those.” He said. 

I could spot the lie in his answer, but I didn’t fight it, instead I gave him my coin and walked up the stairs to where my room was. 

What in all of the nine hells was I doing here?

I played with the vial again and stared at the crimson liquid. I had pondered that little vial a lot while on the road and had considered maybe drinking it. It would have eased my anxiety of knowing exactly where Altan was, but I also didn’t know if it would be safe for him if I did that. I needed to know where he was before I did anything so foolish. Plus, I didn’t know what I really wanted yet. To see Altan, yes. To mate with him…that one still terrified me. But less so. If anyone were to be my mate…oh hells, these thoughts were so unfamiliar to me.

The bed was incredibly uncomfortable and I didn’t sleep well, but I awoke early in the morning and made my way towards the large mansion that sat above the rest of the town. I knew that would be where the Duke would be. However it was little use trying to make an appointment to meet with the Duke. The guards up front scoffed at my asking and dismissed me immediately without a dire need. I found myself growing more and more uncomfortable in this place.

I paced through the streets, my eyes always on the mansion above. I kept hoping I could spot him. I kept hoping I would find the answer I needed to know he was here, that he was okay. 

I never really got accustomed to the way people stared at me, and I felt like all of them were holding back their insults until I did something wrong. I was constantly on my guard. I didn’t really sleep much either. I started to have funny dreams of Altan alone in a room, separated from everyone and everything, pounding against a sealed door, begging to be set free, for someone to let him out. It troubled me every time I woke up from it. I didn’t know if it was my own brain making up this story…or if I should put more weight behind this dream.

I found myself on the main thoroughfare of the town when I noticed a crowd forming along both sides of the road. There was an excited energy about the people. I hung to the back of the forming crowds and wound through the shadows, staying out of sight. I was about to head inside and make myself scarce when I heard the people around me talking.

“It’s hunting day. That’ll be the Duke and his men coming down that hill” I heard a woman say to another woman.

I jerked my head up and looked up the road and felt my heart beat fast as I watched as a large gathering of men on horses slowly made their way down the main road. A pale-skinned man in a red robe was taking the lead on his own steed, looking proud as he waved to the people. His hair was dark, graying, and he wore a circlet. To his right was an even larger man with red-brown hair, a beard and dressed in armor. The men behind were also all armoured and their faces were concealed in helmets, except for three young riders that rode in the center of the guard. Each were young, tawny-skinned and bright eyed, more elfin in their features. And there in the middle, was the one with crimson curls and a strained smile on his face as he waved.

Altan. 

My Altan. 

My breath caught as I saw him there. He was there. He was there. He was right there.

Lordhovid was nothing compared to the want I felt then to jump in front of the horses and stall them from going any further. 

I gripped the vial and shouted his name before I could stop myself. 

He looked over in my direction, searching for who could have said his name. He drew his horse back and slowed, looking through the crowds. His smile fell when he saw me and over the din of the cheers and adulations from the crowds I could only see him mouth “Drun.” And I saw the same longing look in his eyes. We understood each other in that moment.

Our eyes did not stray from each other as the gathering passed on and even as he was going further and further from me, his head swiveled to keep me in his sight. He yelled something back at me, but I couldn’t hear or read his lips. I swam through the crowd, trying to keep him in my sight. I couldn’t let him go. 

“Altan!” I yelled again. Something in me, something I didn’t dare name, was pushing me to stay near him. I couldn’t lose him. 

I stood, devastated to watch him leave me. I pushed my way through the crowds and wrestled my way down the thoroughfare, doing everything in my power to keep him in my sights. I needed to know where he was going. I cut through alleyways to pass through the crowds. My orc hunting skills had never really left me and as I sniffed the air, I could follow the dust trail left behind by the horses and I cut through every back road I could until I could find them again at the bottom of the hill. 

Altan’s eyes met mine again and he shook his head. “Don’t.” 

He was warning me. I glanced over to the man at the front of the team and I saw steel in his eyes as he met my gaze. He turned back to Altan, then back at me. His gaze hardened and he urged the horses to go faster. His eyes followed me as they rode passed and I met his gaze with my own steely glare. He would not have my Altan.